John of Argghhh!! will collect more weapons. He will also buy his wife a new car.

Pam, Drowning at 2 foot sea level, will become a successful stripper, and create new nude animations on the side.

LeeAnn, of The Cheese Stands Alone fame, will see a shrink, and her multiple personality disorder will add 3 new personalities.

Eric, the ex-Marine at Straight White Guy, will travel to Kansas.

Jack, of Random Fate, will move to France, and his brown-eyed girl will soon follow.

Helen, our Everyday Stranger, will have dramatic changes in her life. (yeah, I know, duh!) She will meet someone entirely new, Mr. X, and will fall hopelessly in love with him - only this time, he loves her so much back that he takes her away to a chalet somewhere in the Alps, and she doesn't even have to get a job, unless she wants to.

Rob, our favorite Acidman, will get an agent, and will pre-sell his book for $200,000.

Brainstorming's DC, will successfully quit smoking on March 18th, 2004, and she will remain smoke-free forever after. (Quitting takes practice, I think I quit 20 or 30 times before it stuck, and that was 18 years ago).

The lovely Rachel will start posting again. Yahoo!

Beth's Contradictory Brain will be soothed with Nerdstar's return in 2004.

Jed and Owen of Boots and Sabers will go in on a lottery ticket together and win the whole thing - only it will be the first drawing after someone wins the Big Jackpot.

Lovely Joanie will have really fantastic luck for all of 2004 and all her dreams will come true!

Chris Muir will have his comic strip, Day by Day, syndicated, and start making loads of money on Day By Day Calendars.

The State of Hawaii will extend Venomous Kate's yard 1,000 feet by bringing in 1 Billion buckets of sand. And that asshole who made rude comments to her after the big storm will find that his fingers can no longer type. He will have to make comments with his toes.

Heather will ride a bike from Maine to San Diego.

Key Monroe will get a new job as a radio sexologist. She will become more famous than Dr. Ruth. Key will also get off of Blogspot and onto MT!!

That's all for now. More later. If you would like me to predict your future for 2004, leave a comment!