May 5, 2008
The Castle Work Weekend.
The notable absence of posts this past weekend is easily explained. Bill was busy in Iraq. Dusty was busy not dropping his airplane on our heads.
Fuzzybee was busy with her own big things - Project Valour-IT.
And we had Kat and her Child Labor Unit (CLU) nephew Alex plus Gollum, er, Ry and Ry's Brilliant Better Half (hereinafter referred to as RBBH), and some other friends (Major and Andrew, who keep horses at the Castle) helping us expand the Fowl Barracks of Argghhh! and install fencing for the newest four-footed Denizens of the Demesne, two Angora goats who arrived yesterday and are as yet un-named. Cute though, ain't they?
Mind you - it was a *Castle* work weekend. So some paper did suffer greatly.
And another gun virgin surrendered his virtue to the Dark Side.
If you want the rest of the story - hie on down to the Flash Traffic/Extended Entry.
Flash Traffic (extended entry) Follows �
Over 100 fence-posts were either pounded into the ground or dug in and cemented in place as appropriate (that cement is what that water was for, Kat). The fence is about 950 feet or so long. For those who want more detail on the labors of the day, from a serf's perspective, they should click here and read Kat's "American Gothic" post, if you haven't already.
The Chicks of Argghhh! got an upgrade to the harem for Satchmo's odalisques...
We were under the continual observation and supervision of the Duckques of Argghhh!
Rocky and his harem went out and conducted a FOD-walk, cleaning up all insect-and-grain-debris that might foul the engines.
Gollum was actually fed non-stale Chee-tos, and was allowed to take the unopened bag home with him. He got a tour of the Arms Room, and was very tolerant as the Armorer flitted from item to item nattering on about this and that aspect of this and that. (Just as Alex was tolerant of his class in gunlaying with an added frisson of communications via heliograph).
As noted earlier, Ry had never handled a firearm until yesterday. So, in a compressed session right before he and RBBH departed back to return from whence they came, Ry got introduced to the Albanian SKS, ROMAK-47, M1A, and Springfield Ramrod Bayonet Trapdoor Rifle.
As the target above indicates, Ry isn't a bad shot (admittedly, most of the holes in the 10 ring, but not all, are the Armorer's demo-shooting - but Ry did credibly well for someone with no experience and a very abbreviated "This is how you do it" session, one that concentrated mainly on "This is how *not* to shoot something you don't want to shoot" which is always a prudent start to things.
You'll notice in that photo above, the Guineas of Argghhh! were not too concerned about stray bullets. Nor, probably, aimed shots, either... owhelk, they were clueless, they're guineas and I've got chunks of pink granite from the glacial drift that overlays this part of Kansas that are smarter than those guineas.
I must admit - Ry *was* tough on some of the infrastructure. That or he was sandbagging me and has better skillz than he admits to!
The Master and Mistress of Argghhh! want to thank everybody - Ry, Jess, Kat, Alex, Major and Andrew - for their assistance this past weekend. We had a great time, and only Ry and I shed blood. But, hey, that's just a guy thing.
I'm pleased to report no chee-tos were found floating in the Spa of Argghhh!
Note to employers: If you want someone who comes to work, who works, and when he's done, comes to ask for more work - you want Ry. Really.
� Secure this line!
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
Good taste and discretion only limit my comments to the punch line of the old joke of the farmer being visited by his big city cousin the vertriliquist"Don't be believin tha' sheep lad,she's a fearsome liar"
by big al on May 5, 2008 12:54 PM
And you, sirrah, don't know your goats from your sheep.
Which, in context, is probably a good thing.
The new kids (literally) are Angora Goats.
by
John of Argghhh! on May 5, 2008 12:59 PM
Ohhh... those are cute!
And so are the goats! ;)
Anyhoo...we had lots of fun this weekend (I was instructed to say that).
Of course, when I come out with some more time, I will expect a thorough tour of the vault with various natterins on this and that.
As I told Ry...chics dig scars.
by kat-missouri on May 5, 2008 1:36 PM
I love your goats! What cuties. I usually am a lurker, but had to comment on the kids! I read your blog frequently, keep it up!
Cheers, Leslie
by
Leslie on May 5, 2008 1:39 PM
I guess the goats ain't for eatin'. Since they are "cute" and special.
by JimC on May 5, 2008 1:51 PM
John's leavin' some stuff out.
1) Weaponry.
a) His first shot of the day(with the SKS) was dead center.
b) His first shot with the M-14 was dead center
c) my technique sux and I was getting very, very lucky since I was having to do geometry I haven't done in my head since 10th grade because I couldn't use the sights properly(damn being left eye dominant)
d) John was pretty tolerant of me forgetting to open the bolt each and every time I handed a weapon back to him(I'm an eeeediiiiiuuuut), though I kept the barrel well away from anyone while passing.
2) History lessons are fun. People *pay* good money for that kind of thing, and I got mine mostly for free.
3) Sunburns are *not* fun.
4) Kansas clay is not easy to dig,wet or not, and it sticks to the blades of you tools---makes for really, really, really, muddy boots.
5) If I had the ability I'd do it again(the visit to the Castle that is)
6) I don't recommend the Trebuchet Rides(soft landing my @55!), though the Armorer-provided tour of the Domain is worth the risks involved("Okay, crossing this creek is going to be interesting" -heh.).
by ry on May 5, 2008 2:19 PM
Jim - Angora's usually aren't raised for meat. They're raised for their wool, which spins into mohair.
And they are the preferred material for making beards for Santa, because of the furs's natural curliness.
by
John of Argghhh! on May 5, 2008 2:19 PM
Major gave my new favorite quote:
If you can't ride it, eat it or make money off of it, what good is it?
by kat-missouri on May 5, 2008 2:36 PM
If you can't ride it, eat it or make money off of it, what good is it?
*resisting. snark. toooooo easy -- it's a trap*
by
BillT on May 5, 2008 3:03 PM
And, of course, that is why women rule ;)
by kat-missouri on May 5, 2008 3:07 PM
That is SOOOO cool. Just ignore the green tinge of envy my aura is now emitting. :P
by
Fbl on May 5, 2008 4:24 PM
"And another gun virgin surrendered his virtue to the Dark Side."
I thought I felt a tremor in the force....
At the time, though, I figured it was just Bill removing his thong.
*snort*
0>;~}
by DL Sly on May 5, 2008 8:45 PM
Yes, goats are cute.
I hate cute.
Cute is good for exactly one thing in this world: as a setup for various forms of wordplay. For example:
Beware, O Armorer, for the critters you have just acquired will soon be deploying those adorable fuzzy little faces as weapons in their endless schemes to ...
[wait for it]
... get your goat.
by wolfwalker on May 5, 2008 9:06 PM
Wolfie - you're trying too hard, brother.
by
John of Argghhh! on May 5, 2008 9:26 PM
Hey, Kat - I see why you aren't a licensed marriage counselor... d'you *always* leave yer spa-wear dangling from the shower door of married men?
;^ )
by
John of Argghhh! on May 5, 2008 10:04 PM
As long as you didn't try it on, it's all good. :0
by kat-missouri on May 6, 2008 1:27 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
May 2, 2008
How to annoy the Armorer.
Admittedly, it really doesn't take all that much, if you go about it right.
Take this picture, fr'instance.
Looks like your average normal guard tower on the frontiers of the Demesne, right? Well, that or a deer stand.
Heh.
*I* didn't build it. None of the people I gave permission to hunt the Demesne this year built it.
And it wasn't there last fall. Someone has a rather different view of "Private Property" than I do. It's not like it wasn't marked or something...
Heh.
It isn't here any more, either. And look, the Sun came out and shone brightly as the interloper was destroyed. But the components will become part of the expanded Fowl Barracks of Argghhh!
Which needs it, after having been battered a bit in last night's 80 mile straight-line winds and 1.5 inches of rain... and Ry's Outhouse suffered a bit, too. But he's going to be here this weekend, so we'll get it all fixed up.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
I didn't do it! :)
Besides I prefer portable stands. Don't marr up the scenery and usually are a lot easier on the tree's
by
BloodSpite on May 2, 2008 10:07 AM
We've also had some traffic on our "at the end of a mile-long dead end" road that might be explained by this artifact - that and the mushroom poachers.
by
John of Argghhh! on May 2, 2008 10:12 AM
Can you take them out with a sniper rifle as armed intruders? Some folks have a lot of nerve.
Glad to hear you weren't roughed up too much early this morning (about 0200).
by JimC on May 2, 2008 10:12 AM
Morel Hunters need a 'Shroom Stand? Why, the masses inquire.
BTW - Did Ry's Home Of The Big Buns ever get a proper designation?
by Boquisucio on May 2, 2008 10:15 AM
(shuffle steps over)
Zug zug. Yes m'lord.
by ry on May 2, 2008 10:44 AM
Did you leave them a nice note explaining that armed intruders could be met by an armed response? Possibly an in person patrol, possibly from long range.
You know, just a polite and friendly reminder of the difference between public and private property.
by KCSteve on May 2, 2008 12:47 PM
You've probably destroyed an official government lurking tower. ;)
by htom on May 2, 2008 12:53 PM
Htom - oh, clearly not. They would have put up something like this...
by
John of Argghhh! on May 2, 2008 1:44 PM
We've had similar problems in the past on our property here in Tennessee. But things have gotten better since the Tenn. Wildlife Resources Agency published a new rule that said that hunting on private property without possession of individual written permission from the landowner on the person of each hunter in the party to hunt that specific piece of property would be considered poaching.
And Tennessee law permits the TWRA to confiscate any and all chattels used in the commission of poaching. The last time the local wardens caught a poacher around here they confiscated his gun, his dogs, his pickup truck, and the clothes he was standing in. When his wife bailed him out of the county hoosegow he went home in his underwear, a Tyvek coverall, and a set of flip-flops.
by Blake Kirk on May 2, 2008 1:48 PM
Well, I can have some sympathy for the dogs. They didn't do anything wrong, to get ripped from their home.
The rest, tough noogies.
by
John of Argghhh! on May 2, 2008 1:56 PM
Tack up a few used targets with well placed shot groupings in it's place.. if they don't get the hint from that sort of signage....
by OlafTheTanker on May 2, 2008 6:07 PM
It wasn't a tree stand that surprised us one late summer day when walked the back part of 84 acres we used to own. It was the healthy, well-tended pot plants we stumbled upon.
We let the sheriff take care of it. He said since that part of our property bordered the Daniel Boone National Forest the folks who planted it probably thought they were on public land and no one would be back in that remote area before they could harvest it in the fall.
They thought wrong.
by Gun Trash on May 2, 2008 10:49 PM
Even if it hadn't been posted, building _structures_ on somebody else's property is pretty rude.
And they hurt the tree, too. Somebody might want to saw that tree up some day and make something of it, but couldn't because the wood was all diseased from nail wounds.
by
Justthisguy on May 2, 2008 11:27 PM
P.s. When I worked for Bartlett and acquired my chipper expertise and tinnitus, we were not allowed to climb living trees using climbers on boots. Making a hole in a tree always introduces tree pathogens.
Exception, of course, if the tree was coming down anyway.
Tinnitus aside, I'm glad for the experience, not least because it contributed to Michael Z. Williamson's decision to exempt me from the general chipping of FL voters if he becomes Dictator.
by
Justthisguy on May 2, 2008 11:36 PM
Nothing says "No Trespassing" like a Claymore. A dummy training one, of course.
by Gary on May 3, 2008 8:22 PM
Well it wasn't me, I don't hunt deer.
I do have some experience at hunting people though.
Will work for guns n ammo. No not the mag.
I'm wondering what sort of damage a 30kg rough would suffer if I let crash right through the stand from 500'
by Murray on May 3, 2008 10:11 PM
To quote "The Guide"...
"Absolutely none."
by
John of Argghhh! on May 4, 2008 8:09 AM
Whoever put that stand up needs to take up a safer hobby. Like poking grizzly bears with sticks while wearing a venison chop tied to your private parts...
(Seriously? Hunting without permission on Donovan land? Are you terminally remedial?)
by
Damian on May 5, 2008 9:18 AM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
December 22, 2007
Current Castle Weather.
Thunder snow.
Yep.
Thunder snow.
Winter officially began at 0008 this morning.
Can ya tell?
Kiki and Gunner like it well enough... the horses, not so much.
The juniper wasn't so thrilled, either.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
You will especially enjoy looking back at this photo in July.
Okay now everyone get out there and play bumper cars in the snow.
by
jim b on December 22, 2007 6:23 PM
Man that's ugly. Thought about it as I played golf today. Bit windy though, about three clubs worth.
by
NOTR on December 22, 2007 11:10 PM
NOTR, as someone who lives in a county with about 150 golf curses and exactly one shootin' range, in Southern Florida, with all of the mosquitoes, and damnyankees, and other parasites, I am now wishing for some cold clean quiet snowed-upon landscape.
by
Justthisguy on December 23, 2007 1:16 AM
I'm envious, John - because up here it continues to fall as liquid, of course. Which I don't really mind, except I would love it to be white for Christmas. Umm, don't let BCR hear that, m'kay?
by
Barb on December 23, 2007 10:26 AM
Heh. It's currently in the mid 70s at my house. Now's about the time I start really enjoying the fact that I live in Hawaii ;~)
We used to get "thunder snow" in Alaska. That had to be one of the strangest things I had seen. Until I experienced ice fog.
At least you have power!
by
HomefrontSix on December 23, 2007 11:48 AM
we got plenty of snow, Barb-lady. Don't you remember? Not *my* fault it was scheduled using Outlook and arrived early.
[Oooooo! Double-snark! Tricksy is BCR!]
by
bad cat robot on December 23, 2007 4:00 PM
Thundersnow is about the only thing I haven't had here in the land of cheese and beer this month. I've had ice storms, snow bowls, ice on top of snow, snow on top of ice, and now solid 30-40 mph winds all day.
by
steveegg on December 23, 2007 4:01 PM
Ahem. This is the Emergency Gollum System. This system is activated when certain moat-dwellers can't use the pneumatic message tubes because of ice/giant rats/Unknown Clogging Objects. The following message has been sent:
could you tell everyone I miss them and a Merry Christmas for me? Thanks. Ry
This concludes the activation of the Emergency Gollum System.
by
bad cat robot on December 23, 2007 6:17 PM
The horses don’t look pleased. Do you have a barn?
by
Ledger on December 23, 2007 8:54 PM
There once was a time; a time before my forced exile into the land of cold, cold people in a cold landscape, in which Christmas was a time of shorts, beach and sun.
Sigh - I miss it so
by Boquisucio on December 23, 2007 10:13 PM
Yes, Ledger, we do. But, believe it or not, the horses prefer being out. We can bring 'em in - and they'll happily get groomed and gnosh on some hay and grain - and want to go right back out.
There is a stock shelter in both 40 acre parcels. They can go there to get out of the wind, but they prefer to get into the cedars and stand around close to each other and nibble on the grass under the snow.
Gotta remember - they got along for a few thousands of years before we started kidnapping them and making them our slaves.
/peta
Yesterday SWWBO and I got in the Ranger and took three bales of hay out to them in the upper 40, where they were on top of the hill catching the sun. Last night we had a big round bale delivered and we stuck it in the pasture near the gate.
That way they come to the gate every day and we can count noses and look 'em over, to see if anyone is looking distressed or having hoof problems.
by
John of Argghhh! on December 24, 2007 6:47 AM
Merry Christmas John, SWWBO, Laughing Wolf, and everyone at the Castle! You remain in my prayers, and I'll always have your back.
Airborne, all the way!
Alan Briley, RN
by Alan Briley, RN on December 24, 2007 8:10 AM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
November 20, 2007
The Produce of Argghhh! -with militaria, natch.
In August, we pulled in the first paying crop of Argghhh! our brome hay.
Yesterday, the Livestock of Argghhh! produced their first product...
Ladies and Gentlemen (and the rest of youse) I present.... [drum roll, please]
The Egg of Argghhh!
Nicely situated in an egg cup made of a Brit French "beehive-style" artillery time fuze, circa WWI. [MajMike's comment reminded me I grabbed my *french* egg-cup-made-from-a-fuze, not the brit egg-cup-made-from-a-fuze (actually, they're ashtrays)]
Hey, this *is* the Castle. What'd ya 'spect?
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
It looks like the Holy Grail of egg cups to me.
by Eric Franzen on November 20, 2007 10:27 AM
Faberge?
by
kat-missouri on November 20, 2007 10:33 AM
No, Rhode Island Red or something similar.
by
John of Argghhh! on November 20, 2007 11:38 AM
Heh,
Nice yolk, John.
Sort of the fuze holder for the egg "shell", eh?
respects,
by AW1 Tim on November 20, 2007 11:52 AM
Ohhhh Lordy.. The "Holy Grail of Argghhh" has been discovered. Prepare for the onslaught of Monty Python quotes (which, of course, I won't mind a bit cuz they're FUNNY movies).
Have you located the vicious Rabbit of Caerbannog yet, John? If so, you may think about arming some of those Holy Hand Grenades you keep around there. Could be fun, yaknow?
Or... you could just.....
RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!
by AFSister on November 20, 2007 12:16 PM
Okay, Big Guy - when did you photo-shop that picture you took of me shooting? Note - that "egg" does have just the right amount of hair!! ML
by
Mike Lehnherr on November 20, 2007 1:24 PM
John, I can't believe you passed up a perfect opportunity to say "What'd ya eggspect?"
by
Damian on November 20, 2007 1:54 PM
how funny is this? guess what the one thing he can't quite figure out is over at this place...
http://puzzlephotos.blogspot.com/2007/11/set-206.html
(item #1146)
by MajMike on November 20, 2007 3:38 PM
One wonders what set you too looking for that... MajMike - no matter, your link reminded me I grabbed the French one, not the Brit one I have.
Yes, I have two, what's your point?
by
John of Argghhh! on November 20, 2007 3:49 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
July 23, 2007
Goings on at the New Castle Argghhh!
The "Mark" hovers above the new Castle. The barn, at least.
A starvling cat, with 9 ticks on her (who were *not* starving), appeared at the Barn of Argghhh! yesterday.
You must remember, we a are half-mile off the main road, at the end of a dead-end road, and no lost kitties are known at the three closest abodes-of-two-legs.
Ergo, the sign of Saint Francis of Assissi must float in the air above the New Castle, drawing the needy.
Tentative name is S'mudge. She has very indistinct markings. That, or she's a white cat and *very* dirty. She's talkative, too. No worries, the barn needs an Interior Guard anyway.
Sergeant Kiki and Permanent Private Houdini of the Exterior Guard went exploring. Kiki came back, with a bum foot. She plays the whiny, woe-is-me puppy *very* well. Depending on how much time I have to round up S'mudge, there might be two trips to the vet this week. Permanent Private Houdini apparently got tired and just flopped for the night at a neighbor's house, about a mile away. We policed him up yesterday afternoon. Dolt.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
One of the drawbacks of living in the boonies is how many people ...uhm...tactically deploy unwanted furry family members on ones porch.
Not saying that sthe case, but it happens in my neck of the woods quite frequently.
I would let Huckleberry The Wonder Dog (tm), also known as Huck, Run free on our expanse but I'm afraid my trigger happy neighbors might shoot first and ask questions later of a 120 lb Rottweiler whom is galloping full speed at them in a request to have his bum scratched.
Of course the drool, large teeth and slightly glazed look in his eyes might be whats confusing them......
Until such time he is limited to walking with his slightly overweight owner, which works out for the best all around as he can drag me back to the house when I collapse of heart failure from exertion ;)
by
BloodSpite on July 23, 2007 7:56 AM
I have another friend, yes I have friends, who lives in the county and his cat count is always going up. Feral cats seem to show up in barns and at the doors of country folk as well as the dumped cats and dogs. They seem to know where they will be met with sympathy, food and liquid.
by JimC on July 23, 2007 8:42 AM
Well, I'd be willing to bet that the Mark follows above the Master and Mistress of Argghhh at all times. After all, look at how many wayward kitties have wandered in to the Castle over the years!
*grin*
by
Barb on July 23, 2007 8:44 AM
Oh -- I forgot. The sign over your door applies to all strays based on a much older post about a run away boy who must have seen the sign over the door.
by JimC on July 23, 2007 8:44 AM
So Private Houdini got tired, waited for a ride, and you obliged? Sounds pretty smart to me. They know us a lot better than we think they do.
by
Tim on July 23, 2007 9:41 AM
There's a reason his rank is "Permanent" Private, Tim.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 23, 2007 9:45 AM
I had a permanent private like that. He went out of the platoon position one night for a piss.
We found him the next afternoon two ridgelines over. He was unable to answer as to why he thought crossing a river would be on the way back in when it wasn't on the way out.
Then there was the bayonet practice. "Do NOT stamp on the target. It is wet and slippery, run up to the target, STOP, then bayonet the target. Under NO circumstances will you pin your own foot to the ground!"
I thought I was clear in my instructions.
Private Kyle Harbour pins his foot to the ground, right through his big toe.
He thought he was going to get sympathy till I started listing the potential charges. Disobeying a lawful command, destruction of government property (one boots gp), making his platoon sgt look like a dick in public (capital offence) etc etc.
Last I heard of him he'd taken over my slot. I suspect his incredibly hot sister may have been a factor.
God help the country.
by Murray on July 23, 2007 5:01 PM
Sir, it's obviously written on yer forehead in Invisible Cat, Dog, and Messed-Up Human Kid language,
"Come here, all you lonesome critters, and I'll try to help, and would you like to eat some of this, and lemmee scratch behind yer ears, and...."
.
by
Justthisguy on July 23, 2007 5:50 PM
Dang, Murray, I take it that that particular P. P. didn't have a clue why he wasn't doing well, and didn't say something like, "Sergeant, I don't seem to be very good at this. Could you help me understand what I'm doing wrong, and maybe teach me how to do it right?"
You did give him the opportunity to say something like that, right? Or was he the kind of guy who was just totally hopelessly incapable of understanding why the Sergeant was angry?
by
Justthisguy on July 23, 2007 6:02 PM
JTG
Option #2, always .... (memories of Trooper F).
Cheers
by J.M. Heinrichs on July 23, 2007 7:10 PM
A couple of lifetimes ago I had a cat named Smudge. He was a good guy.
by
Jack on July 23, 2007 8:12 PM
We have had the ranks swell with a couple more felines. Two are going in this Thursday to be spayed and neutered as we can't run the risk of another litter.
I have two more females to spay and then we should be all hunky dory except I want a dog.
I need a dog. I tolerate cats because they are marvels of creation. Miniature predators who permit their humans to pet them, but who also help to pay the rent by keeping down the vermin.
by Cricket on July 23, 2007 10:43 PM
Maybe there is a fine line between genius and idiocy. After all, Houdini got the service. PP Kyle is a little different tho, that is self inflicted pain. No Mensa invitations for him. Does this mean dogs are smarter than humans? Maybe not but some dogs must be.
Well i know in the country here it can be traditional to dump cats on the neighbours. Not to mention city folk who think it's a brilliant idea absolving them of both sin and responsibility.
by
Trias on July 24, 2007 5:49 AM
Jezze man this is Royal New Zealand God Damn Infantry Regiment, not girl guides. I didn't wipe pink little bottom when he went potty either.
Sure we get the frontal lobe removed when they issue us the green hat but I don't think "don't stab yourself in the foot" is too challenging a concept.
EDP was fully utilized, I explained, I demonstrated, I had them practice in slow time. Short of time travel and getting to his mother before his dad did there's not much more I could have done.
My grandfather brought home a kitten from the rail yards once(he was always bringing home strays - this is not an invitation to say things about my grandmother though). He was going to call it Smudge because it was grey. After washing it though it turned out to be a fluffy white persian.
by Murray on July 24, 2007 5:44 PM
Ah, I think I understand now, Murray. I may be a bit slow, and getting more so with age, but think I'm still capable of learning.
It's the politics of it which really chap you, ain't it!
by
Justthisguy on July 25, 2007 2:06 AM
Its the fact that ten years later they gave him my old slot that cures my constipation.
by Murray on July 25, 2007 5:01 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
July 20, 2007
Last night, out at the new Castle...
We find SWWBO practicing for driving her newly ordered compact tractor (an AG King 3540)... and the Lawn Tractor of Argghhh! finally has a challenge worthy of his abilities.
Hmmmm. That sign by her left hand looks familiar.
Well, familiar to those of us who are an age, at any rate.
All part of my plan to make walking/riding in the demesne rewarding in terms of little "easter eggs" throughout the place.
Mind you, they're going to be Armorer and SWWBO "easter eggs" so it will be an eclectic mix of "Achtung Minen" and fairy houses...
And the very real "Warning, Impact Area" signs.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
I love the sign.
Keep it short too near the house.
by
Trias on July 20, 2007 8:41 AM
ROFL ... That sign is perfect!
by
Barb on July 20, 2007 8:53 AM
Maybe I should send you a couple of my spare "Danger: High Radio Frequency Wave Pattern System in Use" or similar signs ;)
by
BloodSpite on July 20, 2007 10:42 AM
Like the tractor!
Are you getting the auger that will drill a hole (holds hands shoulder width apart) about so big? You know, in cawe you need to plant a tree some night to settle down after unsociable visitors.
Just wondering - it's not like I lie awake at night and plot things. I just don't sleep much is all.
by KCSteve on July 20, 2007 1:17 PM
We're getting a nine inch auger, yes.
Wasn't intended for that purpose, no...
by
John of Argghhh! on July 20, 2007 1:38 PM
Besides, we have authorization to burn our trash out in the sticks, without any coordination.
It's only when we burn off the fields we have to get a burn number.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 20, 2007 1:43 PM
I saw a couple of those signs a time or two.
by Cricket on July 20, 2007 4:26 PM
I don't know John, with a 9-inch auger you either have to drill 3 or 4 holes right together or get messy with the uh... fertilizer when you plant those trees.
by KCSteve on July 20, 2007 10:48 PM
Well, as I said, where possible, I will leave pest control to the appropriate agencies - along with disposal.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 21, 2007 9:27 AM
Looks like Murray may have a customer for his new line of gnome bunkers...
by
BillT on July 21, 2007 1:11 PM
When I look at that, I imagine SWWBO shouting, "Woot hoot, Mama Bear is Happ-eee!"
by
Justthisguy on July 21, 2007 11:09 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
July 18, 2007
We're *farmers* now...
Major Arkay - this one's for you.
There *are* signs of progress at the new Castle. Evidence of occupancy are beginning to pop up, but this *is* the Castle...
While we may have minimalist taste in furnishings...
...there *is* a stack of firearms in the family room!
And yesterday, while out checking the hilltop hayfield, I *did* find Werekitty's Pole.
We are now officially farmers. In a technical sense, anyway, I wouldn't make that claim to my neighbors, just the taxing authorities. Our neighbors would just look at us and go, "Yeah, right."
Our sea of grass (brome) has been cut and, less the keep-back for the horses, sold. And I sold a token cord of wood from our woods to my neighbor for $1.00 (he'll get it himself). I'll actually make wood available to friends and neighbors who want or need it - the last few years before he died, the previous owner didn't keep up his own wood-cutting, which has resulted in a build-up of deadfall and other fuel in my little mini-forest.
Besides, if we didn't do that, the county would class all the land as decorative/recreational and triple our taxes. We're going to get some angora goats (easy keepers and Beth can sell or use the wool) so that we justify the pond as a stock tank - else the county would call it recreational, too. And given that around here, house prices are falling, the county is going to be looking for ways to make up the property tax shortfall.
With the agricultural designation, we don't have to pay sales tax on the ATV and tractor, and can depreciate both as farm equipment. We can at least partially depreciate the new truck (which I'm using to move the hay with, among other things) and deduct the mileage for the trips to TSC and Orscheln's for fencing gear, critter feed, etc.
And, yes, I've engaged the services of an accountant - I didn't know all this stuff, and we don't intend to get creative... but we do intend to use the tax code to our advantage where we can.
I am very sore. And if I've lost any volume via weight loss, it's more than made up for from all the swelling due to straining muscles that haven't been doing anything approaching manual labor for a long while.
Speaking of which, mebbe we *are* farmers, just a tiny bit. Keen observers with access to satellite imagery last night would have seen SWWBO and myself, using the truck and trailer into the hours of darkness... hauling hay.
I haven't done that since the summer of '74. And I've got 90 bales to go, and have to get it in before it rains. My arms are vewy, vewy, tiwed. Because every bale gets handled twice... and there are 170 of 'em to deal with. It's good hay, though. The horses will be happy this winter to gnosh on it.
SWWBO and I have already decided how we're going to handle this next year.
Get a keg, have a shooting party. And if ya want beer and targets and permission to shoot (um, *not* in that order, thinking abouit it), yer gonna hafta schlep some hay.
We're not planning on tapping the oil here (there are producing wells on property all around us), nor are we going to jump on the ethanol bandwagon. That whole biofuels plan is simply stunningly wrongheaded in the impact that it's going to have on the economy - national and international. Food is going to get more expensive (all that livestock that feeds on... corn) which will hit the poor hardest. And since we're talking numbers that would essentially divert the entire export crop of the US to biofuel production - well, there will be a worldwide impact when you consider the US produces over half the corn in the world.
Heh. One of the changes that quadrupled US agricultural productivity came about with mechanization - prior to that, fully half our in-production arable land was used to feed the horses and mules and oxen that powered domestic agriculture and the retail transportation system - and with the biofuel plan, we might well find ourselves once again using half our agricultural production to fuel transportation, as well as taking marginal lands now forested and putting them back into low-productivity cropland.
I just don't get it.
We're not going to put any acreage into the Crop Reserve. I don't feel like giving the government any more power to tell me how to manage my dirt than they already have, though we're busy leveraging the extension service and USDA about forest management - so I can get rid of the built-up wildfire fuel in our woods without ruining habitat or causing erosion problems.
Heh again. Being a "gentleman farmer" has certainly changed some of my reading and research topics.
But we're starting to attract the hummingbirds to the deck, and when we get the other bird feeders going, we'll get the songbirds, too. And since we're in an open area away from the woods, I don't think I'm going to have the squirrel problem Dad does. Of course, we won't have their entertainment value, either.
But with at least two nesting pairs of hawks, the squirrels don't venture out into the open very much. The rabbits don't either. I saw an unlucky one get snagged by a diving hawk yesterday.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
Well just remember the Western Diamondback Rattlers are a protected species.
In addition I believe you have to invite them to dinner once a month and provide medical care for them.
They will probably want to set up a commune and elect officials to provide you with future health and comfort demands.
And lastly always underinflate the tires incase you do run over one so that it won't hurt the lovable little critter.
by
jim b on July 18, 2007 8:42 AM
Could be, Jim - but if they're that lefty-oriented, they'll prolly avoid us like the plague!
by
John of Argghhh! on July 18, 2007 8:46 AM
I forget how the joke goes precisely but someone once told me that snakes are non-political. The difference being the snake warns you before biting, the politician not.
And they never bite lawyers, citing professional courtesy.
That being said, Hay prices down here have skyrocketed. Some of the locals are importing hay from s far as Texas.
Fortunately our tax system doesn't work like ya'll's or I'd be in a world of hurt.
But if you need a hand mending fences, you know who to call ;)
by
BloodSpite on July 18, 2007 8:56 AM
I think the green empty beer bottle makes the weapons picture. Guns and alcohol together woo-hoo. BTW, green beer bottles means your an upscale or have upscale pretensions family. Green being the color of money, at least it was, beer companies going for the well heeled aim their advertising at the upscale discrimating drinker and use green bottles to attract them. At least that's the theory I heard.
by JimC on July 18, 2007 10:02 AM
Heh, I dunno. SWWBO, the brewer's daughter, bought the beer.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 18, 2007 10:15 AM
Well, there are lawyers that are snakes, and lawyers that are land sharks that walk upright.
*gathers up tomatoes to compost and uses the good ones for marinara*
I prefer the land sharks. Snakes are bottom feeders.
That said, congratulations on the digs. The wool of angora goats? If she makes contact with a local spinner's or weaver's guild, she will never have to worry about keeping the cash flow steady.
Feed em right to keep the hair soft and lustrous
and you will command a good price. Don't get into the intensity of processing them beyond shearing or combing. Let the 'end user' do that.
They will skirt the fleece or pick through the combings...helk, you might even get a few to comb your property for the hair they shed in the spring! Fiber people are...interesting. Of course, I should know...I have been buying Spin Off magazine for over ten years now...
by Cricket on July 18, 2007 10:20 AM
Cricket,
We have a fiber person in our Lions Club. She is "hair" brained. An aging hippie (her own description of herself) she not only raises the goats and shears them she processes the wool, dyes it, spins it then knits afghans, wool socks and the like from it.
Gee, I just wander down the aisle at Wal-Mart and pick me up a pair of socks whenever my toes start showing through my old ones.
The thing that gets me is how she gets time to do all this. She takes frequent trips. Last year alone she went to Thailand, Germany and a cruise to Alaska, not to mention the many trips to fiber festivals all over the lower 48. I get jet lag just thinking about it.
by
NevadaDailySteve on July 18, 2007 10:36 AM
John, I see plenty of opportunity for some more flooring work! LOL
by fdcol63 on July 18, 2007 10:45 AM
John - your idea for a combined shooting/hay hauling party sounds like fun. Just make sure to schedule the hauling before the shooting, etc. :-)
by
Barb on July 18, 2007 10:46 AM
LOL. Yep. I don't go to many fiber festivals, but I do have spindles and a spinning wheel and love to prep the fleece and spin it.
I knit socks and sweaters and well, after you have worn a pair of socks hand made for your tootsies with all natural fiber, you will never go back to mass produced. It reduces the price, but there is something intensely satisfying to me to be able to carry on a tradition as well as knowing the nuts and bolts of how textiles used to be made.
Sort of like John knowing how the barrels of guns
are rifled and the metal content and all the fiddly bits in the Whatsis challenge.
And the trade off is that she most likely knits on long flights as well as gives up other things
to do this.
by Cricket on July 18, 2007 10:56 AM
Thanks. Great photos. Y'all have a truly beautiful farm there.
One minor point: "biofuel" isn't just ethanol. It also refers to all kinds of fats and stuff which diesel engines can burn. For instance, some folks go down to Micky D's, dip out the french fry oil from the grease dump, take it home and filter it, then put it in their diesel engines (some work without added diesel, some need diesel) and do their thing. 'Course, when they drive by, everyone gets hungry...
All kinds of technological possibilities there, without interfering with the animal and human food chains.
Unfortunately, our guvmint has chosen the one really stupid one -- ethanol.
by MAJ Arkay on July 18, 2007 11:25 AM
So that looks like a Mauser or Ariska, an SKS, an AK Variant, but whats the one on the far right that sorta looks like a Sten?
by Brad on July 18, 2007 12:59 PM
John,
Some clever folks up in South Dakota (If I recall correctly) have come up with a slight twist on the ethanol business. Their process works with the 'waste' from the corn (cobs, stalks, pretty much anything from a plant). If their system works out you could see an increase in corn production.
Of course the Gov't being what it is I'm sure they'll get singled out in the funding race - to make sure they don't get any.
by KCSteve on July 18, 2007 1:04 PM
The gun on the far right is a suppressed M3 'greasegun,' or at least a mockup of one.
Is that one of the Valkyrie Arms (made right here in Thurston County, WA) jobs with the mocked up suppressor/barrel extension (so as not to be an SBR) John?
by
Heartless Libertarian on July 18, 2007 1:54 PM
Heartless - yes, it is, and danged fun to shoot, too! Not quite as good as the grease gun I schlepped on active duty, but fun nonetheless.
Brad - the rifles, from left to right are: Brit .22 trainer, Yugo SKS, SMLE converted to a .22 trainer, a ROMAK, and the M3-clone, as already noted.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 18, 2007 1:59 PM
WHHOOO HOOOOO!
I've got a POLE! And a very nice one too, with plenty of swingin' branches.
by Were-Kitten on July 18, 2007 10:56 PM
Reading this blog keeps getting more interesting.
As I passed the phrase "fencing supplies", there was a momentary tilt while I considered the possibilities; foils, epees, sabres, or barbed-wire.
Back in college, a girl I knew complained that her parents wanted her to take a fencing class. When I asked if she thought it would take her a full semester to learn how to get the wire tight, she hit me.
by homebru on July 19, 2007 6:38 AM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
July 10, 2007
The National Colors...
The Flags of Our Denizens... the national colors of the Denizens of Argghhh! have flown at the Castle. I also learned that when you tighten the halyard per your habits, aluminum flag poles lean a bit...
Now, by visitor stats order...
The Red Ensign of Canada.
The Red Ensign of Australia.
And because Murray insisted, the Blue Ensign of New Zealand.
When I get another 2 cubic feet of cement, a second pole will arise another flagpole will reach for the heavens - which will normally fly the Castle flag (when the design is finalized) and on appropriate days, the aforeposted colors will fly as well, and the US Army flag when the mood seizes me. Heck, I might even indulge in a little regionalism and fly a Kansas flag, too.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
Are you going to do the Higgins thing with your salute gun for retreat?
by JimC on July 10, 2007 8:33 AM
Keen flagpole, John, and even keener halyard tension. ;)
Btw, can you believe there's yet another Red Ensign controversy? It shouldn't be this difficult to pay tribute to one's history.
by
Damian on July 10, 2007 9:00 AM
Boy, Senator the General Dallaire is *not* going to approve of my flying the Irish Brigade and other militant/period flags from the second pole at the Castle on appropriate days. Equal to the national color, even. One reason for having two poles, so I can fly things equally.
He really needs to find something else to get that excited about.
It's not like it *replaced* the Maple Leaf, for pity's sake.
I do have a Maple Leaf flag, and should I have visitors out at the Castle from Canada, I will fly that. Unless they are Brigadiers, in which case I'll let fly the ensign. I think I'm probably safe from the good Senator as a visitor, so I shouldn't offer any inadvertent offense there.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 10, 2007 9:25 AM
Keith put a flagpole up at my house just in time for the 4th of July. It's magnificent! I still need to get lights for it to properly display the flag though.
by AFSister on July 10, 2007 2:32 PM
No you don't, AFSis. You can save all that money by putting it up in the morning and bringing it down in the evening, rather than the *koff* lazy patriot's method of shining a light on it all night...
I may not fire the salute gun every day (but I plan to on holidays) - but at Castle Argghhh! the flag flies to the normal rhythm.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 10, 2007 3:24 PM
Allow me to extend a virtual salute.
by
USCitizen on July 10, 2007 7:35 PM
I'm lazy- AND practical, John. I know I'll forget to take it down/put it up, and I want the flag up as often as possible, so I'm getting lights.
pththtththhththtth
by AFSister on July 10, 2007 9:14 PM
Don't you have two Child Labor Units that can be trained to the task?
8^ )
by
John of Argghhh! on July 10, 2007 9:54 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
July 8, 2007
Marking the demesne, and other things, like toys for boys.
Meet the Ranger of Argghhh! Polaris Ranger. Perhaps we should name him... Strider.
We got that puppy to add to the Motor Stable of Argghhh! because the place is big, and has but one real road that runs through it. The lower forty is a sea of grass (eminently sellable brome hay) running along the creek and cliffs, and the upper forty is hilly, and a touch rocky, that is half woods half native grass pasture. Gotta run the fences.
Which I did yesterday, to mark my territory in a fashion no one will have any doubts who lives here. Hey! Don't give me those funny looks - SWWBO's got her own sign plan...
Besides, unless you go on foot - using the Ranger is the only way you will get to that part of the property that you can look back at the Castle on the Hill.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
Those pictures came out great, handsome! How did your day go today?
by
beth on July 8, 2007 5:36 PM
Oh, you were marking your territory with signs! Oops.
by
Tim on July 8, 2007 6:33 PM
I *could* get her a flare gun...
by
John of Argghhh! on July 8, 2007 7:17 PM
You mean your recon vehicle can't pop smoke? You better get on that.
by
Tim on July 8, 2007 9:09 PM
HA "wheels".
I just sprained my face sneering.
There isn't even a turret.
by Murray on July 8, 2007 9:52 PM
All in good time, Murray, all in good time.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 8, 2007 10:13 PM
On a tangential note: you might want to talk to some local birdwatchers before you mow the Lower Forty, and invite them in to have a look around. That looks like a field that might attract ground-nesting and/or grass-nesting birds, some of which are on various endangered lists.
by wolfwalker on July 8, 2007 11:15 PM
ask the dear SWWBO to put a SMLM plate on the back of the Polaris Ranger and we can chase her thru the woods until she finds her way home...
by MajMike on July 9, 2007 8:02 AM
Murray - these are available - would that help fix your face? Hmmm. Prolly not.
by
John of Argghhh! on July 9, 2007 8:21 AM
Wolfwalker,
I wouldn't sweat the birds or other small critters. Those that are smart enough will get out of the way of the mowers. Those that aren't will come off easy enough with a hose and some soap.
John, great looking place. You interested in sub-letting? Maybe start an old warriors commune?
Respects,
by AW1 Tim on July 9, 2007 10:37 AM
Does it come with a pink tutu?
Look for that price* I could BUILD you a fully functional mini-Sherman.
Just get me some workshop space a list of handy furnace making gear, a pile of casting aluminium, some common enginering tools and you'll be the first kid on your block with his own tracked snow plow this winter.
*(Green card and plane ticket sold seperately).
by Murray on July 9, 2007 6:25 PM
Hmmm. Murray, why do I think this has more to do with the green card than the tank?
;^ )
by
John of Argghhh! on July 9, 2007 7:37 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
June 24, 2007
Preparations proceed apace for the Castle Relocation.
Yesterday SWWBO and I went out to the soon-to-be new Castle Argghhh! to check on the eviction proceedings of the squatter.
The farm not having had any dairy/beef activity in two years and little to no human activity since the estate sale in March, a critter had taken up residence in the nice, comfy, dry and easy-to-work dirt in the barn.
As we intend to put Willy and Pete, the Destriers of Argghhh! into that facility, the squatter needed encouragement to relocate.
We took the approach many governments do to squatter villages. We had it bulldozed, or, in this particular case, bobcatted. Then we dumped about 13 tons of gravel on top of it, as the place needed leveling and some other site-prep work prior to installation of the stalls. We hope the squatter was out food-gathering and not buried in his tunnels - but if you aren't bright enough to get out from in front of the bulldozer, perhaps your little corner of the gene pool needed some chlorine, anyway.
Regardless, the work was well done, and there was no evidence of the squatter having returned, a good thing.
SWWBO and I then went to do a little shopping. Browsing, really, as we weren't intending to buy just yet. We checked out the farm supply places for their stockage, and pricing on fencing materials, and went out looking at various types of atv/utility vehicles, as one is going to be needful to put out fencing, bringing in firewood, during pasture burns and such. We also did some general "driving the back roads" rubber-necking. Doniphan County, Kansas (two counties north of us, we were headed for Saint Joseph, Mo) is really pretty country, and is completely unlike what most of you *think* Kansas looks like.
Doniphan, Atchison, and and northern Leavenworth counties are all part of the "Glacial Hills" region of Kansas, marking the greatest extent in the region of the glacial epoch of the 2nd Ice Age, circa 700K years ago. The legacy of that is loess soils (a product of the grinding action of ice on rocks, and requires real efforts to control soil erosion, as it's poorly bonded together essentially being rock flour...) and glacial till (sandy, clayey dirt mixed with non-native stone that's been scooped up, carried, and then deposited by the retreat of the glacier), which in our case manifests as a lot of pink granite and very loose soil littering the countryside (that's what's caught my eye thus far, I haven't really done a rock-type survey yet) in addition to the limestones of the Lower Shawnee group that provide the bulk of the stone in the region.
There's also oil in this area - and with gas prices at their current level, there are currently a lot of horse-head pumps nodding up and down. According to the maps, there is an active well on the parcel to our west, and several active wells to our north and east. Yes, the mineral rights come with the land. No, we're not intending to become oil barons.
Back to what we were doing, away from the geography lesson (hey, that's my undergrad degree, I've had to brush it off a bit, I admit).
We intend to *walk* the fences to check them, because we can both use the exercise - but I'm not walking the line (especially along the rocky cliff by the creek) *and* schlep fencing materials with me. Nope. We'll walk 'em and then drive up there to fix 'em as needed. As we're actually going to be a bona-fide farm (crop: brome hay - should be able to make enough to pay the taxes on this place and supply the needs for our horses and mebbe some select horsey friends) we'll even qualify for the farm equipment sales tax exemption - as long as we buy a vehicle with bench/bucket seats, and not a four-wheeled motorcycle. We're looking at Polaris Rangers, John Deere Gators, Kawasaki Mules, etc.
I'm also in the market for a smallish tractor - but that may wait until next year, after we see how expenses run this year. I've got a buddy with a tractor, a trailer, and a truck to pull it with that I might be able to con into bringing out my way if I have a need... Right Leavenworth Centurion? 8^ )
Anybody need a thirty-year-old milking machine?
Just checkin'.
Today will be a trip to Cabela's to procure gun-fodder, targets, and target stands, as we expect to host a small shooting party at the new demesne on July 4th. We'll also take a gander at and endure sales-people pushing the Kawasaki Mules at us.
Speaking of all that... 'tis time to Sit, Shower, and Shave, and head off to Cabelas!
While I'm doing a Urban Yuppy Farmer-wannabe post I might as well use this space to put up installment three of the Armorer's Sister's live-in remodel...
The rebar snakes have slithered away. ☺
Yesterday they began to dig a big hole in the mud. Although there is not enough data to establish statistical significance, I believe we have a trend. Dodger’s urinary adventures appear to be correlated with bobcat use. They use it and he pees. We’ll have to track the trend for a while before we know if the hypothesis is correct.
Boomer, the large-and-in-charge tuxedo cat apparently spends the entire day supervising the project from the window, including telling the workers what to do. They think he is funny.
While they were excavating, they also broke the cable line to 2 television sets and my Internet connection. Teenage girls get VERY upset when there is no Internet because that is how they connect with the outside world. Come to think of it, we weren’t too pleased either. When I left this morning the project supervisor (human, not feline) was outside fixing it. I did not rub his face in the fact that many people are following this little journey, but I may include him on the list.
You will be relieved to know that the ice dispenser has been repaired and now dispenses ice and not parts. Boomer supervised that, too. Including climbing into the repairman’s tool bag. It’s a good thing he likes cats.
Installment two, should you need to catch up - is available here.
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
Ya know, I kept hearing the "Green Acres" theme in my head while I was reading this :-D
by
Harvey on June 24, 2007 9:17 AM
Well, I can understand that - but I'm not expecting any Arnolds.
Might hear some "Wilburrrrrrs" or, more accurately, "Amorerrrrrrs" now and again.
by
John of Argghhh! on June 24, 2007 9:51 AM
Prepare the catapult range, I'm leaving this socialist paradise the moment the guards look the other way.
Did I mention all my uncles were farmers and hay making and fencing are skills I perfected before age 12?
Also milking but I no longer accept the existance of such a time as "5am" so you're on your own there.
by Murray on June 24, 2007 7:04 PM
Got nothing to milk... hence the willingness to part with the machinery - so I can move my tools into that space!
We're going to have a kiln, we could prolly manage a forge...
by
John of Argghhh! on June 24, 2007 8:22 PM
And a 44 gal drum sunk into the earth... no reason and nothing to do with this reading on explosive metal forming I've been doing.
by Murray on June 24, 2007 10:57 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
April 5, 2007
The Rock Fort Files, Part Trois
Oh-kayyy, continuing the tour (and referencing some of the comments) from the intro and part two, I showed you the business end of the murder holes above the drawbridge (and which are also featured along the Watch Wall). However, they are *holes* and you wouldn't want your fellow defenders stepping into one while performing guard duty at o'dark thirty, right? To preclude that, you pop murder hole covers on top of 'em. No big deal, until you get to a staircase, right?
Nope. Still no big deal. Just takes a tad more wood.
Okay, looks like everybody's got the theory and practical application (open cover, peer into hole -- if hostile person appears, drop something heavy or sharp on him) of murder holes.
Next up, embrasures. Holes piercing the defensive walls to allow the use of projectile weapons.
Comme çi...
All the embrasures at La Rochepot were originally designed for use with crossbows or arbalests, and when the hand-gonne arrived, said embrasures had to be modified to accommodate the difference in diameter between a quarrel and a barrel.
They kept the organic bench rest, though.
Hey, kat! This is what a firing port looks like from the *other* side. The extension leaf is original hardware, the staple and retaining pin aren't. Note the triangular opening which allows you to snipe with a crossbow. Pop the port open and you can snipe with a field piece.
A castle's gotta have a donjon, right? In this case, in 1789 or so, the representatives of Liberty, Fraternity and Political Correctness decreed that the donjon had to go. It was plainly a remnant of the aristocracy (despite an ancestral demonstration of Fashion Courage) and, worst of all, it was visible to the townsfolk -- a quotidian reminder that there was -- ummmmm -- a *castle* on top of the hill.
So, they started tearing it down.
Got it 90% demolished and then some unsung genius said, "Hey, if we're gonna turn this place into a tourist attraction two hundred years from now, we've gotta have a donjon for that certain castle je ne sais quoi." Unfortunately, the stone had already gone south to build a manse or a barn or something. So, since they had no hope of restoring the donjon with it's original stone, the baronial (but egalitarian) descendants stuck up a sign saying, "Yeah, this used to be the donjon. Anything else on your mind?"
The present descendants are usually out of town during tourist season. Something about harvesting chips in Monaco...
All righty, then -- to the comments.
Barb, I'm sorry, but I couldn't get into the dungeon -- the door was blocked with comic books, mostly old Asterix and Obelix and pre-1978 Métal Hurlant.
However, I wandered out along the moat (it's *dry*, remember?) and got this shot...
Cricket - the kitchen's thirty feet wide and extends for most of the length of the east wall, which is probably seventy feet long. Five stoves and a scad of copperware.
NevadaDailySteve - If there was ever any stained glass in the chapel windows, it fell victim to the ages, but there's more edged weaponry in the armory and barracks than you can shake a stick at -- although our cute li'l tour guide said that most of the goodies were sold off in the 1960's to defray operating expenses. No interior pix allowed -- they sell 'em in the gift shop, though, to take care of those pesky operating expenses. Along with miniature knights, field pieces and toy Airbus A-380s. *shrug*
BCR - No Albigensians were harmed during the production of this post. Final editing was accomplished using recycled carbon-neutral electrons. Ummmm -- just don't ask about the balrog and methane, okay?
Murray - A castle isn't *quite* like a monastery. Monasteries don't generate Comment Parties and Castles *do*. As in, below. At least, I *think* it's a Comment Party -- they're obviously communicating...
Warning: Extremely Work Unsafe, unless you happen to work at the National Gallery, the Tate, the Guggenheim, the Louvre...
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
Oh, that's just Euro-art, Bill. That's okay!
by
John of Argghhh! on April 5, 2007 6:57 AM
One word.
Pronounced "Feh-SEE'-shus"...
by
BillT on April 5, 2007 8:09 AM
sat-ahyuhr
by
John of Argghhh! on April 5, 2007 8:26 AM
Well, yeah, I knew the dude with the dinky horns and cloven tootsies was a satyr (all those extra syllables a Kansas thing?), but I hadn't realized that oreads were so zahf'tĭg.
Kinda kicks the definition of sylph-like in the kneecap...
by
BillT on April 5, 2007 1:31 PM
A satyr and sylph
Decided to play
On a keg of wine
One Bacchanal day.
They rolled and they tumbled
A good time was had
Until they got to the barrel
and lo, they were sad.
For so immersed in their play
and intense their desire
They forgot that others
would also require
A drink.
by Cricket on April 5, 2007 2:42 PM
Wheeee! Cricket's giving Cassie some competition!
by
BillT on April 5, 2007 6:12 PM
Technically, I'm not sure those qualify as murder holes. They look more like angled embrasures for archers, arbalesters and/or gunners to directly sweep the drawbridge. I've always heard the term "murder holes" applied only to vertical holes in the ceiling of the entry tunnel, just inside the drawbridge. Attackers bust the drawbridge/door, rush in, get stopped by the portcullis, and then the defenders drop all sorts of nasty things down through the holes. Boiling water, hot sand, rocks, stuff like that.
by wolfwalker on April 5, 2007 7:43 PM
Wolf - Technically, you're absolutely right about the drawbridge -- a murder hole is an opening in a floor, rather than a wall, and were most commonly used in the vaulting over the entry passageway.
Also technically, I think they're called machicolations (if that's the proper spelling) when they're incorporated into the overhang.
But "murder hole" just sorta resonates, doesn't it?
by
BillT on April 5, 2007 10:59 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
by
CW4BillT
on
Apr 05, 2007
April 4, 2007
The Rock Fort Files, Part Deux
*grumble*
Major Real Life Intrusion (nothing awful, just excessively time-consuming, resulting in a post-on-the-fly).
Stuff that makes a castle a castle are primarily defensive (which worked fairly well before the advent of siege engines and long-range guns. What's interesting about this shot of the wall (aside from the window added a whole lot bunch of years later) is that the defenders' firing ports pierce the wall -- no crenellations necessary. The moat is dry and the bottom is a good twenty feet below the sash of the new window.
Nip down-post to yesterday and look at the drawbridge from an attacker's viewpoint. Visualize the bridges in the upright and stowed position. Now imagine you and your platoon have just spanned the gap with a temporary bridge and are setting the ram in place to start knocking on the door.
Now, look up.
Heh. That's why they're called murder holes.
Note the blackened spot from the medieval napalm delivery system.
Gotta scoot, but if you can't wait for tomorrow, go here for a G2 exercise.
To be continued...
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
I had located that web site on a search after your first post. It doesn't show the location of the Jungle Room, which is why I asked ;-)
I guess we'll have to wait a little longer for the shots of the dungeons so that Ry and I can compare.
by
Barb on April 4, 2007 8:39 AM
I am liking this very much. although, am I confused or doesn't it look like there are crenallations at the top that have been "filled in" and roofed over for modern convenience? You know, the little maroon squares right below the roof?
by
kat-missouri on April 4, 2007 11:41 AM
Those red squares are gun ports that were originally embrasures, Kat. The roofed portion is the armory and barracks and the turret to the left is the Captain of the Guard's quarters. All three stories of it.
by
BillT on April 4, 2007 2:15 PM
Bill,
Your stuff is better than the official stuff! Did you get any pics of the chapel? Stained glass is interesting to me, not just the result but also the process they go through to make it. Of course, pictures of weapons and armor are also appreciated as are the architectural details. Just show us all!
by NevadaDailySteve on April 4, 2007 4:02 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
by
CW4BillT
on
Apr 04, 2007
April 3, 2007
The Rock Fort Files
Introducing a New Category: Castle Pr0n. Which *actually* should have occured when the Adjutant visited Jolly Old and sent John a pic of something that looked like it'd been built about the time Merlin was still learning how to make zwieback disappear.
All the link pics are Hi-Rez, 'cuz you guys *deserve* Hi-Rez.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"You're lost."
"Why do you say that? There's only one road west out of Beaune and we're on it."
"Because I haven't seen any signs for Rochepot."
"Nope. You won't, either. The French figure that if you know you're on the only road to La Rochepot, signage is superfluous."
"How many miles have we gone?"
"Kilometers. They use kilometers here. Eight or so kilometers from that last farmhouse, so about five miles."
"We should have been there already. You're lost. We're never gonna get there!"
Then, right on cue, we rolled out of the curve at the top of the hill and we got there.
Of course, I also went for the classic dorm-wall travel poster shot...
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
"You are Americans, yes?" From the waitress at a café in Beaune.
"Yes." *grin* "Is my accent that bad?"
"It's the lack of accent. You don't speak like a German or an English. Where do you go next from here?"
"Lyon."
"Pffff. You won't like Lyon -- it's like Paris, but smaller. Beaune is much nicer, and you can drink the same wines you'd be drinking in Lyon, except less expensive. We make it here and send it there, so you just pay for the wine, you don't pay for the wine and the truck. And the food is much better."
She had Kate the Luddite Wife at "wine"...
And our waitress understated the food.
Later in the afternoon, during my third double espresso: "Have you seen La Rochepot? It's very famous. No? Good -- that's where you will go right after breakfast. Naturally, you will spend the night in Beaune, in the lovely hotel across the street."
"Uhhh -- your parents wouldn't be the owners of this convenient hotel, by any chance?"
"No, my cousin's parents do. But my mother runs the restaurant and my father tends the winery and is the somelier."
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Meanwhile, back at La Rochepot, I'd finished navigating the two-door skateboard through the town main drag (one oxcart wide) and up the forward slope to the castle parking lot. And, as luck would have it, the drawbridge was down. Up to the ticket clerk, plunk down twenty euros for one adult and one adult-sized Luddite and into a postage-stamp courtyard that looked like the dry run for the Versailles gardens. If you'd been teleported in, you'd realize *toot-sweet* that, showy or not, the folks who'd called this place "home" were serious about security -- the normal homeowner just isn't concerned enough about withstanding a siege to dig a well 72 meters down through solid rock.
Naturally, KtLW just *had* to see what 72 meters looked like.
Took her about a minute to realize she would *not* be able to see through the oaken cover about three inches down. The mailing tube is from her *first* visit to the souvenir shop.
Oh, yeah -- that pretty design on the roof you noticed in the long shot of the place isn't just an interesting pattern of weathering. They did some serious upgrades in the 16th Century with glazed tiles (I almost backed into the oubliette getting that shot -- fortunately, it hadn't been occupied since 1789 or so).
Oh, yeah -- another clue that this wasn't just a baronial summer home with an extreme makeover is the Fear Me portrait of one of the previous owners.
Except for the forelegs, he kinda looks like John getting set to play with a bayonet, doesn't he?
So much for the decorative stuff. Things that make a castle a *castle* on the morrow.
Firing ports. Embrasures. Murder holes.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Just another fine service from the Castle Argghhh! staff -- traveling the hinterlands with a product of the Joisey Public School System so *you* don't have to...
Reporting As Ordered, Sir! �
Firing ports? Feh.
Castles are like monasteries. Couple of flights of B17s and its all over bar the buck passing and blaming the kiwi general [gough]cassino[gough]
by
Murray on April 3, 2007 6:59 AM
I'll cover the underground hangar and SAM batteries later.
by
BillT on April 3, 2007 7:40 AM
Hey! I haven't stabbed myself in... months, anyway!
by
John of Argghhh! on April 3, 2007 10:03 AM
There is something about a castle. I see one and I revert to about 10-years-old. Castles are Kewl!!! Has it got any empty armor suits standing around with medievel weapons? Did you spit in the moat? Tell me more!
Forgive me for I know not what I do.
by NevadaDailySteve on April 3, 2007 10:31 AM
I, ah, know someone who also really really likes castles and took pictures.
by
bad cat robot on April 3, 2007 10:57 AM
*sighs*
I just love it when Bill speaks in subtitles.
What a terrific looking town off the beaten path.
Gives me ideas, it does.
by Cricket on April 3, 2007 11:13 AM
Ummmm. Carcassonne! Montsegur! Wheee!
by
John of Argghhh! on April 3, 2007 11:14 AM
Ahhh - Castle pictures. Hmmmmmmm. Sounds like a great area to explore!
Where's the Jungle Room?
by
Barb on April 3, 2007 1:10 PM
We'll have to wait until Bill posts his pics of the interior to see if it is suitable for parties.
We do need to add some house elves, minions and
other assorted house servants to the mix. It comes with a moat so the monster will feel right at home.
Wot about the kitchen, eh?
As Castle Chef I needs to know.
And for those who either know or don't give a hoot, Belgium has enacted a barbecue tax of 20 Euros just to fire up the grill. This aggrieves the Chef because grilled tasty animals and charred vegetables keep the Denizens happy.
So, in solidarity with our suffering brethren stationed there, I offer this menu which we did indeed ingest this Sunday past:
Honey Sesame Pork Tenderloin, recipe from the OWC
cookbook from Fort Lewis
Cucumber and Carrot slaw with a sweet sour dressing (recipe mine)
Rice pilaf.
The meat was grilled.
Dessert was Rocky Road ice cream
by Cricket on April 3, 2007 2:59 PM
Another reason (not that I needed more) to not live in Belgium.
Great museums though.
And friteurs. With Mayo!
by
John of Argghhh! on April 3, 2007 5:10 PM
And gorgeous blond w'men with ....uh....huge tracts of land! that serve beer!
Or maybe I should just stop staring at my Beer bottle labels......or beer posters....or...
*ahem* anyway
by
BloodSpite on April 3, 2007 5:48 PM
Thanks Bill.
Have just started planning the next European Vacation for the Seza clan, and will now lay over in Beaune rather than Dijon.
Hope to include Lille this time to visit my Great-great-uncle's grave, too. (Caught on the wire during a raid in WW1)
by
SezaGeoff on April 3, 2007 6:57 PM
Spill some beer on his grave for us, Geoff.
by
John of Argghhh! on April 3, 2007 9:21 PM
I do hope you take pictures of the cemetary and your great great uncle's grave.
John, the best part of the Belgian story is that the government is going to use helicopters with thermal sensing equipment to enforce the ban on grilling.
So much for carbon footprints...
heh.
by Cricket on April 4, 2007 8:08 AM
And since I can't resist a good snark nor the hint that Bill planted subliminally on the pic, I offer this:
"Bill, I think I dropped our return tickets. Could you be a love and get them for me? I am pretty sure that I know how to use this rope and bucket contraption, being a Luddite and all..."
by Cricket on April 4, 2007 8:12 AM
Heh. As if.
I had our tickets, passports and everything else foldable and/or valuable in my Boz ID pouch. I don't give anything I know I'll need later to someone who is adamant that a mile is 5,287 feet long...
by
BillT on April 4, 2007 2:31 PM
And Sugar Buttons responds:
"Kate my darling precious, you didn't drop the tickets, they are on top of the three inch oak
cover."
How big are those ID pouches anyway? The Engineer convinced me (against my better Virgo judgment) to pack my clothes in one suitcase instead of my original idear to have a nightie, change of dainties and clothes in my knitting
bag.
It was MY suitcase that got lost, necessitating a few days of staying with the Engineer Parental Units until the Air Force could track down said case...and then driving to Hagerstown, MD to get it.
He had the presence of mind to not get anywhere near where he could hear me say 'I told you so...'
by Cricket on April 4, 2007 5:41 PM
How big are those ID pouches anyway?
'Bout 4.5"x4.5", opening up into 4.5"x9", multiple velcro'ed pockets, zippered pouches and some cargo netting stay-downs, most of which are quite usable. Not quite big enough for a nightie and dainties, though, unless you shop at Vickie's Seekrut...
by
BillT on April 4, 2007 11:41 PM
MUST RESIST SNRK...
There. Are those ID pouches still sold or would I have to go to Boz to get one?
I have my life reduced to an ID card, a debit card and a driver's license.
My knitting bag is now a back pack, taken only when I have to knit socks or matching sweaters for said socks.
My Precious is the new, four wheeled purse.
heh.
by Cricket on April 5, 2007 2:50 PM
� Dismissed, Soldier!
by
CW4BillT
on
Apr 03, 2007
