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Young Buck, Old Bear.

Ahhh, yoots. Young lust was on display this weekend, and the old Grizzly c**k-blocked a young buck.

We had District Conference this weekend, which is sort of a a big deal, and as I was presenting and occupy a position of leadership, my attendance was both de rigueur and the check had cleared. Beth, of course, is deathly ill (you can read about it on her wall), so I got to take over animal husbandry chores. Conference involves dinners and speakers, so I got home 9-ish Saturday night, and fed the rabbits and horses, and Buffy and I got the goats into the night pasture. It's now pushing 10PM, and as I've been sick this week too, I was about all-in.

Buffy's ears perk up, and she starts barking. There's a old red-and-white Chevy Blazer coming down the road towards us. Really? Towards us? That Last Homely House a mile-in on a dead-end gravel road? At 10PM? Buffy knows This.Is.Wrong. and is going manically ape-shit. I stand in the driveway, arms akimbo, backlit by the barn light. Think an orotund and fuzzy Not-So-Jolly Green Giant.

The vehicle approaches, and starts to slide on past the driveway when the driver notices the Watcher-in-Shadow, and comes to a halt. I amble on over.

Buffy holds the vehicle at bay. (That's her story and she's sticking to it)

I wander over, and, window down, there sits a ruggedly handsome young man in a plaid shirt and farmer's baseball cap. Across the bench front seat is a sweet young thing in Daisy Dukes that pretty much confirm a full-brazilian, a tied-off shirt, and totally not making eye contact, studying the Castle Argghhh! rock intently. Right out of Duke's of Hazzard, this.

"Can I help you?"

"Um, no, I think we're just lost."

"Ah. This being a dead-end gravel road that ends in a pasture gate, you can understand why I came over since it's 10PM on a Saturday. We're not used to visitors this time of day..."

"Um, yeah, I was just going to um, turn around. You know, over there." as he points at the driveway.

"So, lost? Are you looking for the retreat center on Meagher?"

"Um, er, yeah, that's it."

"Yeah, that happens a lot. One of the reasons I come out when strangers are on the road, they're often looking for that place and missed their turn."

I then proceed to give him directions, and he's clearly antsy to get away.

I close with... "BTW - you should know there's an infra-red game camera down there. We're keeping track of critter traffic for my friends who hunt the property."

"Uh, um, yeah, thanks" he mumbles as he wyes his way to turn around and leave.

The Not-So-Jolly Green Giant watches the yoots motor off into the dusty absence of gelid light from the pale sliver of cloud-obscured nearly-set moon that is waxing crescent, likes God's Fingernail, as it settles into the trees on the horizon. [That's my Bulwer-Lytton entry this year, methinks]

A derisive snort.

Like folks dressed like that are searching for the Catholic Retreat Center at 10PM on Saturday night.

Young lust will have to find another place to slake itself. And hopefully the word about the camera will spread amongst the yoots of the county.

The only card I didn't play was to say, "Oh, and the missus is on the school board, bubba." 


When you're feeling better,  maybe the noise from some night firing exercises would reinforce the message.  LOL
What fdc said, but I'm thinking flares would be more fun.
 That's the problem with the older guys, they know all the tricks, mainly as they have pulled most of them at one or another.
Give Beth my regards. Hope she recovers soon. I'm still feeling rough. I probably wouldn't if I had not gotten dehydrated. I'll only be in the office for a half day today and tomorrow. Tell her to drink moar! Water, that is. :-)
Pray tell exactly how detailed was your inspection that you can say with such absolute certitude that the young lady was proudly sporting a FULL Brazilian?
 Simple.  Her shorts were... short.  
Heh, heh. My daddy had a story from his Patrol days when he uttered the words "And I know both your parents."