You are sitting in the Blog Throne, in front of the computer, in the basement corner where the gun-bench is, and you see movement in the pre-dawn murk that is the dawn of a cloudy winter's day at Castle Arrghhh!
You look up, and it's Petey, the one-eyed destrier of Argghhh!. Followed by Diablo, a boarder. And Buttercup, a boarder, and three other horses, all boarders.
You bemusedly put down your cuppa joe, and swarm up the stairs, yelling "SWWBO! The horses have escaped!"
Her response is unprintable. Neither of us is dressed to head outside.
There isn't too much worry, however. Horses are predictable, and this breakout was planned as a raid on the pantry. I make my way around the new windows, which are stacked everywhere "acclimating" (yes, we're having new windows installed in December, why do you ask?) and don semi-appropriate attire.
While SWWBO finishes dressing out, I head to the top of the pasture, sure that the upper gate is the source of egress for our escaped internees. The owner of the clown posse we're boarding dragged a round bale in there last night, and most likely didn't secure the gate. No point in enticing/cajoling/ wheedling/bullying them into the main gate if they just are going to sprint back to the egress point.
Eh? Whazzat over there?
It's... *white.* We have no white pferde. The white, horse-sized dog, Buffy, is accounted for - she's asleep on the couch after an early morning teeth-bared disagreement with Kiki followed by a crunchy repast of kibble.
WTF? A white cow? SWWBO comes home with interesting stuff sometimes, and yesterday admitted that she almost brought home a Golden Retriever puppy. As in the get of an AKC registered champion for the bargain price of $1500 - which would have become just another giant family member whose job it would be to scour the demesne of burrs, only to deposit them in the sleeping space of Argghhh!, so that they might torment our dreams and fill our underwear, in a most uncomfortable way.
No, that's a cow. A white one. Visions of prophecy come to mind, but those only relate to white buffalo or elk, or deer. Nope. Don't remember one about a white cow suddenly appearing to save the world.
So, until I feel like canvassing the neighbors (I have a good idea which one) about a missing heifer, we have a cow. Good time for the county assessor to come by. Horses don't count as farm animals, but cows do...
Or, as one of SWWBO's pals on Facebook put it, "T-bones from heaven!"
You look up, and it's Petey, the one-eyed destrier of Argghhh!. Followed by Diablo, a boarder. And Buttercup, a boarder, and three other horses, all boarders.
You bemusedly put down your cuppa joe, and swarm up the stairs, yelling "SWWBO! The horses have escaped!"
Her response is unprintable. Neither of us is dressed to head outside.
There isn't too much worry, however. Horses are predictable, and this breakout was planned as a raid on the pantry. I make my way around the new windows, which are stacked everywhere "acclimating" (yes, we're having new windows installed in December, why do you ask?) and don semi-appropriate attire.
While SWWBO finishes dressing out, I head to the top of the pasture, sure that the upper gate is the source of egress for our escaped internees. The owner of the clown posse we're boarding dragged a round bale in there last night, and most likely didn't secure the gate. No point in enticing/cajoling/ wheedling/bullying them into the main gate if they just are going to sprint back to the egress point.
Eh? Whazzat over there?
It's... *white.* We have no white pferde. The white, horse-sized dog, Buffy, is accounted for - she's asleep on the couch after an early morning teeth-bared disagreement with Kiki followed by a crunchy repast of kibble.
WTF? A white cow? SWWBO comes home with interesting stuff sometimes, and yesterday admitted that she almost brought home a Golden Retriever puppy. As in the get of an AKC registered champion for the bargain price of $1500 - which would have become just another giant family member whose job it would be to scour the demesne of burrs, only to deposit them in the sleeping space of Argghhh!, so that they might torment our dreams and fill our underwear, in a most uncomfortable way.
No, that's a cow. A white one. Visions of prophecy come to mind, but those only relate to white buffalo or elk, or deer. Nope. Don't remember one about a white cow suddenly appearing to save the world.
So, until I feel like canvassing the neighbors (I have a good idea which one) about a missing heifer, we have a cow. Good time for the county assessor to come by. Horses don't count as farm animals, but cows do...
Or, as one of SWWBO's pals on Facebook put it, "T-bones from heaven!"
Second the motion on "T-bones from heaven." Medium rare, please.
The ghost of Christmas Future.
You know, a couple packs of RIT dye and a mop would fix that whole "white cow" issue, and leave you with some plausible deniability.
Just sayin'.......
If I remember correctly, there is a Russian and a Japanese fairy tale that involves a magic white cow :o)
In the Russian case, a little orphan mutilated by her evil stepmother had her hands grown back by the magic white cow and then had to put herself through the said magic white cow ears (like get into the left and get out of the right) in order to become gorgeous :o)
In the Japanese case, you just had to treat the wondering white magic cow well in order to save you from the evil stepmother...
There is also a myth about a white elephant, similar to the white everything else.
Maybe you could get some magic beans for that cow.
oh, and in the Japanese version, you would find a gold coin in every hoofprint :o)
while the gold coins are questionable, the fresh milk should be tempting enough to bring her closer to the house, no?? :o)
I fully intend to charge the owner with feed costs when they appear.
If they don't appear, we have a new pet.