Good grief!
Journalist/pundit David Brooks whines:
What a victim you are! Just off the top of my head I can think of a number of ways you could've assured his hand wouldn't have spent more than five seconds on you and nobody else would've known:
1. Pinch the skin on the back of his hand, hard, while keeping your own hands in your lap. If he manages to muffle the yelp, he won't be able to block the reflexive pull back of his hand. And he won't do it again--that hurts! After he moves his hand, cross your legs and push back from the table a bit so that your lap is in view of everyone else.
2. Pretend to take his hand in yours under the table, then bend a finger back (same result and followup as #1)
3. Make a smart remark about people who are inappropriately touchy, or make up a story about someone who once invaded your space and how you stabbed him in the hand, or something. You're a journalist, for God's sake--words are your business. Surely you could've found a subtle way to let him know you didn't appreciate it, without making a public fool of either him or you.
4. Stand up and take a stroll (go to the bathroom), then stand in back for awhile if it's a large event. When you come back to the table, you can subtly move your chair away from his, making it harder for him to reach you.
5. Politely whisper behind your napkin, "Thank you for the compliment, but I don't swing that way/I'm taken."
Did he have some serious dirt on you, or are you just pathetic? I mean, really. The last time a male touched me inappropriately we were in a private situation and he ended up rolling on the floor (I had warned him that's what would happen). You wouldn't last five minutes as a woman.
Or maybe it didn't happen at all, did it?
Journalist/pundit David Brooks whines:
I sat next to a Republican senator once at dinner and he had his hand on my inner thigh the whole time.David, David... don't tell me you're really this stupid. It's not like he's your employer and can make your life miserable if you rebuff him. The only reason he had his hand on you all evening is because you let him.
What a victim you are! Just off the top of my head I can think of a number of ways you could've assured his hand wouldn't have spent more than five seconds on you and nobody else would've known:
1. Pinch the skin on the back of his hand, hard, while keeping your own hands in your lap. If he manages to muffle the yelp, he won't be able to block the reflexive pull back of his hand. And he won't do it again--that hurts! After he moves his hand, cross your legs and push back from the table a bit so that your lap is in view of everyone else.
2. Pretend to take his hand in yours under the table, then bend a finger back (same result and followup as #1)
3. Make a smart remark about people who are inappropriately touchy, or make up a story about someone who once invaded your space and how you stabbed him in the hand, or something. You're a journalist, for God's sake--words are your business. Surely you could've found a subtle way to let him know you didn't appreciate it, without making a public fool of either him or you.
4. Stand up and take a stroll (go to the bathroom), then stand in back for awhile if it's a large event. When you come back to the table, you can subtly move your chair away from his, making it harder for him to reach you.
5. Politely whisper behind your napkin, "Thank you for the compliment, but I don't swing that way/I'm taken."
Did he have some serious dirt on you, or are you just pathetic? I mean, really. The last time a male touched me inappropriately we were in a private situation and he ended up rolling on the floor (I had warned him that's what would happen). You wouldn't last five minutes as a woman.
Or maybe it didn't happen at all, did it?
One of the bonuses of being a woman - it's not so easy to tell when I'm excited to have been groped.....although the Chief can always tell.
Well, you tell some funny stories. *I* even got a chuckle when you told 'the one where you met the ==
Oh. *That* kind of rolling on the floor.
Never mind.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I mean really. There's quality control dammit.
And Brooks was probably miffed he hadn't been seated next to Barney Frank...
For the newbies, the Army names buildings in honor of *deceased* individuals.
Unlike the Navy, which names ships in honor of *living* politicians...
*nipping for the bunker before Maggie and FbL start stirring*
As for the "journalism" represented in that article... just more evidence of the destuctive nature of the narcisstic "all news alla time" media beast destroying the fabric of civilised (that spelling's for Argent) life and discourse.
I mean, gad, it's almost like they're putting up posts about bayonetting themselves and such.
What the piece needs is yet more commentary from experts in the field. I Argent specialist journalist from the Centre for Researched Research and acclaimed Man to Man Advisor with years of experience in all sorts of obscure positions, would be happy to weigh in on the need for proper groping protocol, provided they promote my new book Hands in Pubic Places. I will necessarily emphasise the need not to be used as a glove in case Republicans expect political favours. Democrats of course get the favours for free. Joining me could be our expert at assertiveness trainer Fuzzy who will demostrate a kneed for the advanced 'please don't' technique on all prospective crutch explorers. Following up would be John who is touting the advantages of sisal rope in low impact collisions, which will also need at least 4 days of intense expert analysis.
Argent, love your comment! As to whether a closeted senator grabbed him, I suppose it's perfectly possible. That it happened as he described it is either risible or reflects poorly on him.
Yes Bill, his rolling on the floor was accompanied by clutching and moans of excruciating pain. But like I said, he was warned. :P Agreement with you about Navy ships. *sigh* They're even naming submarines after live politicians these days. Loved the story, though! And Frank? Talk about lack of quality. *shiver*
I mean, gad, it's almost like they're putting up posts about bayonetting themselves and such.
One difference: I don't think Brooks intended to cause people to laugh at him. ;)
Argent, your last is pure gold! ROFL
Argent is rather droll when he's on familiar ground...
Oh? Really? I never bother with that.