Comments for Caption this...

Caption this...

2009-05-18T17:24:16Z

...here's the actual, boring caption:

05/14/2009 - Vice President Joe Biden meets with U.S. Sailors enrolled in the basic underwater demolition/SEAL course on Naval Amphibious Base Coronado, Calif., May 14, 2009. Biden and his wife Dr. Jill Biden are visiting several commands during a familiarization tour of naval facilities in the San Diego, Calif., area. (DoD photo by Mass Communication Specialist 1st Class Ryan Valverde, U.S. Navy/Released)

C'mon, you know you can do better.

I'll get you started: "And the door to my Sooper Sekrit bunker in the basement of the Naval Observatory is, like, y'know, gosh, *this thick*!"

Comment from Hank on 2009-05-20

2009-05-20T16:40:47Z

"I'm just telling you, I'm not an Asshat, I'm not an Asshat, and I've got a list of creditials this long to prove it. Wanna hear a few National Secrets boys?"

Comment from Spalding Smails on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T22:05:24Z

Ahoy polloi... where did you come from, a scotch ad?

Comment from Tom on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T21:04:56Z

How would you describe the look on almost every one of their faces? Utter disdain, disgust? It sure as hell isn't respectful awe or enthusiastic joy.

Comment from Glenn on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T16:27:17Z

Bubble over one of the guys in the front row: "I thoght Obama said no torture in his administration."

Comment from Mahlon on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T13:59:02Z

"Bob Uecker thought the seals would love a good fish story."

Comment from Fishmugger on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T13:19:01Z

"So I visit the Castle on a regular basis and John my good friend lets me shoot his guns and Beth, his wife makes me an omelet."

Comment from BillT on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T11:47:24Z

"...and wearing the Interceptor vest under your shirt and jacket buffs you up and *still* protects you against swine flu."

Comment from Bob on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T10:41:55Z

"And we flew in on this plane with propellers spinning like this, and the sound was like, Wiiirrrrrr!"

Comment from Daniel on 2009-05-19

2009-05-19T08:28:31Z

"God love you boys, but really, Seals are cute and fuzzy when they're only this big. Really. And you boys are a lot bigger than that. ... oh, god love ya, ... what am I saying?"

While blond dude in front, second from right is thinking, "One more minute of this and I'm ringing that damn bell."

Comment from Arditi on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T04:21:27Z

"...and thats' how you juggle Coke cans! haha..ha... All...righty now...who wants to test the Vice-President's guns!? I've been doing a bit of the Nordic Track back home and...I...think I can take any pussy here! Who's first!?"

Comment from TheNewGuy on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T03:22:35Z

Holy Smokes... Ted Knight from Caddyshack all the way

Comment from 11B40 on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T03:00:51Z

Greetings:

Photo Caption: Enthralled Navy SEAL trainees listen to Vice President Joseph Biden recount the
highlights of his military career

Comment from John of Argghhh! on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T02:38:04Z

Good one, Mike!

Comment from Mike on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T01:51:54Z

So how do I get away from this moron and begin Hell Week?

Comment from Whoopster on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T01:44:18Z

You call that a tat? Ya wanna see a tat? I'll show you a tat, you ain't seen a tat 'til you've seen mine! The O-man calls it a tramp stamp, Harry calls it his target, but is it wrong for a guy to have a simple tat on his lower back?

Comment from Old Blue on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T01:41:07Z

I can never remember which one is the mizzenmast. Is it that one, or is it the other one? What the hell does mizzen mean, anyway? I'll tell you what's mizzen... the plaque that says, "This is the mizzenmast!" That's what's mizzen!

Thank you! You've been a great crowd! Remember to tip your wait staff!

Comment from Old Blue on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T01:17:52Z

You talkin' to me? You talkin' to ME? YOU talkin' to ME?!

Comment from Joe McDade on 2009-05-18

2009-05-19T00:31:45Z

Oh yeah? Well, who f------- wants some? You? You?

Comment from Julescat on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T23:46:31Z

the dental bill for these fake choppers was this long!

Comment from SSG Jeff (USAR) on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T23:40:24Z

"C'mon - who wants to give me a hug? How about you, Mr. Instructor?"

"Michelle and I bench pressed a log "this" long!"

Comment from Richard Palmer on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T23:39:23Z

"I heard 'draw mister'. I turned around and there was a 6 year old kid. Well, I threw down my guns and walked away. Little bastard shot me in the ass"

Comment from Fishmugger on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T23:35:01Z

Pretty tight cheeks eh boys. All those olive races when I was pledging. So I know hardship. You seals ever have olive races? Had trouble with the maraschino cherries though.

Comment from Passerby on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T23:30:37Z

Technically, Private, it's called a "Pocket Square"

-

Comment from Sammy Finkelman on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T22:55:58Z

Now all you have to be very careful about being photographed - if Al Qaeda got hold of a picture of you dressed like that, they could accuse us of being Brownshirts. President Obama, as you may know, just stopped some photographs of treatments of detainees from being published. And this could have the same effect. So we have to watch out for that.

Comment from John of Argghhh! on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T22:19:39Z

Heh. 6,000 visitors in three hours, most of whom tried to leave a comment didn't help... and I"ve been cleaning up, too!

Comment from Neffi on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T21:50:58Z

Hmmm. That Semi-Autonomous Comment Repitition program BCR installed is really padding the ol' numbers, John! 8^ )

Comment from Tim on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T21:32:47Z

"Altogether now, boys, sing, 'I'm the very essence of a modern major-general...' .. why aren't you guys singing?"

Comment from Joe Biden on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T21:08:20Z

So, you Navy boys out on your boats must fish a lot, huh? Well, let me tell you, I caught this fish in the Potomac with Barry last week...thing was this big!

Comment from Patrick Carroll on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T20:44:43Z

"...so the genie clicked his fingers, there was a puff of smoke, and when it cleared I left facing a pianist *this* big..."

Comment from Joe on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T20:09:41Z

"You see, I know what you boys are goin' through, being away from home and all. Joe Biden's got a helluva commute riding the Amtrak everyday, let me tell you. And you all get to wear t-shirts; well just look at me, all dressed up in this heat. Has someone got an ice cream or something? I'm so hot I could kill a man with these two guns, get it? My arms?! I guess John Kerry was right, you boys are a bit slow, just joshin'!"

Comment from GMS on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T20:07:38Z

"And then, there was this time, at band camp, let me tell you ..."

Comment from Axey on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T20:03:30Z

Have you seen the ass on the first lady? It's this wide....I swear to God.

Comment from Neal on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:51:20Z

"You know, you can go into a 7-11 store - you know the stores I mean? The ones where you can't walk in without hearing a Hindu-Indian accent? Well, anyway, you can walk into the 7-11 and get a hot dog this big!"

Comment from Mark B on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:49:05Z

Looooove. Exciting and new. Come aboard...we're expecting yoooooooouuuuu!

Comment from mister conservative on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:44:57Z

Having persevered through survival traning which included specific courses on how to resist "Enhanced Interrogation Technigues" even waterboarding, the young SEALS-to-be crack almost immediately when they are exposed to just a few minutes of Joe Biden's off-the-cuff remarks.

Comment from Mister Conservative on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:32:54Z

In conclusion, er, let's see, did I ever tell you I was the first one in my family to go to college? Er . . no. . . that was Neil Kinnock, not me.

Well, did I ever tell you how Obama is "the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy." Am I talking out loud again? Sorry, that was stuck in my brain from last year's campaign. Too racial. My bad.

How about the one that "we're gonna have an international crisis, a generated crisis, to test the mettle of this guy [Obama]. I can give you at least four or five scenarios from where it might originate. . . .And he's gonna need help. .. . Because it's not gonna be apparent initially, it's not gonna be apparent that we're right." No, they made me promise to stop saying that.

Forced down over the desert from sidewinder missiles while traversing the superhighway of terrorism? Damn, ixnay on that one too, per Rahm Emanuel.

So, what's left in Tailgunner Joe's bag of tricks? . . .

Anyone want to pull my finger? I dare you.

Comment from eric on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:31:56Z

accidental shooting at life fire exercise shocks nation

Comment from Deborah on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:29:17Z

What "Fishmugger" said.

Comment from MTF on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:18:16Z

"So, and you'll love this part!, so then I said to my mother, 'Mom, I got elected! And she couldn't believe it!' So now I get to live in this big house and I get my own bunker!"

Comment from Jim Tremblay on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:16:17Z

I think I might have a much longer IQ than you do, I suspect. It's, like, this long!

Comment from eric on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:03:44Z

Son of Bob Hope entertains wildly enthusiastic crowd.

Comment from Julescat on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T19:00:08Z

are there any Indian-Americans here? Aw what am I saying? This isn't a 7-11!

Comment from eric on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:56:45Z

Unknown stand up comedian receives roaring laughter at Mr Universe convention

Comment from ODix on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:49:52Z

No, really, those of you smiling know what I mean, Obama is the most wonderful, competent, leadershipful CIC we've ever had.

Comment from Paul D on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:49:51Z

How 'bout a Fresca!

Comment from snl on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:47:42Z

"I know most of you kids don't get Botox, but, I swear to God, the needle is this long!"

Comment from CDR B on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:43:18Z

I had a nice tie all picked out to wear today, but the Secret Service took it away. They were afraid I would hang myself. But then they replaced it with a sturdy rope, so I'm thinking, this sure would make a cheap tie. Anyone know how to tie a bolo tie?

Comment from Greg W on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:37:51Z

"It's easy to grin when your ship comes in and you've got the stock market beat. But the man worthwhile, is the man who can smile, when his shorts are too tight in the seat."

Comment from Sammy Finkelman on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:37:47Z

This could look very bad. People could think that because you are all wearing brown shirts that you like the Nazis. We have to get away from things like that.

Comment from Matt on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:34:34Z

Come on, sing it with me--- The LOVE BOAT! Soon will be making another run . . .

Comment from fdcol63 on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:32:58Z

"Oh, come on ....we all know Nancy's telling a whopper that's THIS long!"

Comment from BIll on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:31:22Z

They said BUD/S training would be excrutiating at times, but this is cruel and unusual!

Followed by: I give up! I'll talk! Just make him SHUT UP!!!

Comment from Quityerbitchin on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:30:25Z

Chicks dig me, because I rarely wear underwear and when I do it's usually something unusual. But now I know why I have always lost women to guys like you. I mean, it's not just the uniform. It's the stories that you tell. So much fun and imagination.

Comment from Matt McIntyre on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:29:43Z

Personally, I've always thought the Navy was full of imbeciles and panty-waists … what?…why are you camera people all looking at me like that?…there's a bunch of SEALs standing behind me right now isn't there? Jeez, I've done it again.

Comment from blake on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:28:24Z

"she don't call it 'Billy Baroo" for nothing!!

Comment from Kevin WM on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:28:17Z

Gee whiz, how do you sailors see out here?! The sun feels like it's this close to my retinas.

Comment from 2klbofun on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:27:09Z

Thought bubble above crowd:

"And this joker's one heartbeat from being CiC. God help us all."

Comment from Change? on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:26:48Z

"And I don't like nobody touching my stuff. So just keep your meat-hooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff, I'll kill you. Also, I don't like nobody touching me. Now, any of you homos touch me, and I'll kill you."

Comment from Matt McIntyre on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:26:23Z

Comment from Chad on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:26:16Z

Come on, give Blow Hard Biden a break. You don't know how hard it is for Biden to stand up in front of all those guys, all of whom know he's a coward, a liar, and a complete tool.

Comment from 2klbofun on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:25:48Z

Thought bubble above crowd:

"And this joker's one heartbeat from being CiC. God help us all."

Comment from Chuck on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:24:33Z

"You guys wanna know what scary is? I'll tell you what, you haven't tasted fear 'til an RPG comes this close to takin' off your head. No lie, I nearly took one of those bad babies right between the eyes over there in the Green Zone... Believe me, aint none of ya ever been scared like that"

Comment from Charliefreak on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:21:52Z

Who here has ever landed in the Afghan Mountains while under fire? Anybody? Anybody?

Comment from Julescat on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:20:26Z

Let me tell you this joke that FDR said on TV the day in '29 when the stock market crashed.

Comment from Kevin WM on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:20:26Z

I just saw a terd this big in the latrine.

Comment from robopox on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:20:23Z

" no, really, ....you'll just have to point your finger
and say BANG! after our budget cuts"

Comment from Fishmugger on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:19:32Z

So the staff at the White House said I was going out to San Diego to see the seals and I thought they meant Sea World. But hey, you guys are just as good.

Comment from Jim Tremblay on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:18:47Z

"I think I might have a much longer IQ than you do, I suspect. It's, like, this long!"

Comment from Tony on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:14:56Z

So dere I wuz in Tora Bora, and I droo my trustee six-shootrrrs and says to Bin Laden, "Fill yer hands, Pilgrim!"

Comment from Chris on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:13:09Z

And then I drew my six shooters and took down those Somali pirates with three shots.

Comment from S Robert Hitchcock on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:12:40Z

No kidding, when I was in college and before I graduated at the top of my class with 5 degrees I helped to start the SEAL program. Honest to God. Hey that reminds me, where’s Chuck Graham, standup Chuck, let everyone see you…

Comment from bob on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:12:38Z

No kidding, Cheney's is this big!

Comment from Paul B on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:12:25Z

"So the Jew turns to the Homosexual and says that's what he said! Ha Ha!" Followed by cricketts chirpping and staffers quickly ending the photo op.

Comment from David on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:08:27Z

"Seriously, it's THIS big. I'll whip it out if ya don't believe me, biatches."

Comment from Brian on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:04:15Z

"Hey, which of you fellas want to pull my finger?"

Comment from Norris on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:02:47Z

"...about this long. So yeah, I got it going on!"

FTR, if these guys are BUD/S students, they aren't SEALS (yet).

Comment from Charliefreak on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:02:45Z

Who here has ever landed in the Afghan Mountains while under fire? Anybody? Anybody?

Comment from David on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:01:04Z

"Seriously, it's THIS big. I'll whip it out if ya don't believe me."

Comment from Gerry Owen on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:00:46Z

FIVE DOLLAR....5 DOLLAR...FIVE DOLLAR FOOT Loooonng!

Comment from Brian on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T18:00:37Z

Hey, which of you fellas want to pull my finger?

Comment from Tom on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T17:59:24Z

"Can we go back to SERE training? Please?"

Comment from Bob Owens on 2009-05-18

2009-05-18T17:44:17Z

"And then I said to Lovey, 'Dear, I knew Gilligan was daft, dear boy, but why did he never decide to search the other side of this place called Guantanamo?' and he finally did... and here we are."