Sometimes, things get lost in translation...

The Internet is a powerful tool.  And with free translation tools, such as Babelfish, you can surf stuff written in foreign languages and still gather good info that will enhance and improve your life, all without having to stick an icky fish in your ear.  Those who know, know.

But, sometimes, well, something gets lost in translation.   Yanno, like this scenario...

You're a German, and you are searching for some info on loading and firing the .50 caliber M2  machine gun.

So, you go to an english-language website and find this:

To load the weapon, first pull back on the cocking handle.

Slap that into Babelfish, ask it to translate to German, and you get this:

Um die Waffe zu laden, ziehen erste auf dem spannenden Handgriff zurück.

As a test, you put that back into Babelfish and translate back to English.  And you get this...

In order to load the weapon, first withdraw on the exciting handle.

Not too bad, right? Heck, that sounds like it might even be naughty!  And, after all, you're German, you can catch the nuances of your own language and work it a bit if you need to for your own website.

Now, some French guy comes along and copies the German.  This is what he gets:

Pour charger l'arme, premiers retirent sur la poignée captivante.

Let's slap *that* back into Babelfish and see what happens when we take it to English.

To charge l' arms, first withdraw on the captivating handle.

Hmmmm.  That's not working out so well, but it's still understandable if you have basic firearm knowledge.  Now some Italian guy wants the text - and he gets it from the French website:

Per caricare l' arma, primi ritirano sull'impugnatura captivante.

Back to English from the Italian:

In order to load l' arm, first withdraws sull' captivante grip.

Ruh-roh.  Then along comes a Japanese guy - to the Italian site.

Ya see how this is going, right?

So, you're Johnny Jihadi and frankly you're tired of those hoser Crusaders who keep whacking you and your buddies with long range machinegun fire - even when shooting from helos dammit!  This when your fire control tactic of "Spray and Pray" (you are very devout, after all) doesn't quite seem to be earning the blessings your Imam told you praying while spraying would bring.

You chat it up with your buddies and the guys you have working the bazaars near Kandahar and your research leads you to the concept of something called "spade grips" as a way to impart some control on those automatic weapons when they are in the "rock n' roll" mode. 

So you go and start surfing.  But... you don't have high speed access, you can't stay online too long on your cellphone or those bleeping Crusaders jam your signal, you know the deal.  So you get lots and lots of text, but you block the the pictures. 

You find out spade grips aren't a new idea.  The Crusaders use 'em on their Chinooks... 



Uncle Bill used 'em on Hubert during Vietnam.   

Shoot, the Crusaders even put them on their rifles: 




Then you hit the motherlode!  You find out the French used 'em in WWI and in conjunction with a pistol grip!  And they *won* that war!  Now that makes you all funny in the pants.  You know what you have to do! 

And that's where we find out that somtimes, well, things get lost in translation...



H/t, whoever sent me the pic - 'cuz I don't remember who you are.