Heh. Here's my interpretation, which probably would have Madame Obama's head spinning and spewing pea soup ...

Barack Obama will require you to work.

No more welfare. Poorhouses will be built, complete with corporal punishment for slackers.

He is going to demand that you shed your cynicism.

No more claiming conservatives delight in oppressing minorities/foreigners/polar bears without documented proof. Any newspaper that prints the words "only went to Iraq for the oil" will be shuttered, burned, and salt strewn on the smoking wreckage.

That you put down your divisions.

We are gathered here to mourn the passing of identity politics and affirmative action.

That you come out of your isolation, that you move out of your comfort zones.

You will be required to have friends with different political views than your own. If you have none, the Politburo will issue you some.

That you push yourselves to be better.

We don't care how you feel about it, what's the right answer to that math problem? Self-esteem doesn't build bridges or cure cancer. No literacy, no diploma.

And that you engage.

The Enemy. Always attack into an ambush.

There, doesn't that make you feel better? ;-)

Indeed.