Now watch closely as I segue effortlessly into a dissertation on local chow, which is the reason for the title of the post, after – oh, Geez – *tell* me you didn’t think it was because of the underwear…

Breakfast items you’d recognize are fruit juices, diced melon (various sorts), hard-boiled eggs, baked beans (Boston-style – just like Maggie makes when she pops them from the can into the nuker), milk, boiled chicken livers, yoghurt (unflavored) and a variant of French toast – Alan will have to make do with honey, rather than maple syrple. And, of course, coffee and tea. And a surprisingly good assortment of pastries. You'll find them available at the better hotels in the capitol.

But, since I'm *not* in the capitol (and the Guide Michelin ain't made it to these parts, podnuh), I've been eating items you probably wouldn’t recognize: qeema – minced, curried mutton or goat, paratha – a kind of fried pita with the consistency of a soft taco, kulcha – a smallish pancake sprinkled with sesame seeds, allo bhujia – boiled, sliced potatoes, banana peppers and cayenne in hot sesame oil, channa – chick peas and hot peppers in a kind of lentil puree, and biryani – a rice-veggie stir-fry. Pick any three in combo, add a cardamom-apple turnover and wash down with coffee or tea.

Lunch and dinner usually start out with soup – spiced pumpkin (take equal parts of pumpkin puree and chicken broth, bomb it with chili powder and a teaspoon of cayenne), chicken and mushroom, or mulligatawny – lentil puree with ground mutton (or goat) and rice, with a hint of napalm. You wouldn’t recognize the luncheon entree, although you may have seen it wandering around earlier: boti – cubed critter, charcoal grilled with peppers or murgh qorma – a chicken stew, heavy on the cayenne; paratha and jelly. Lunch is pretty light and generally finishes up with fruit or shahi tukra – a bread pudding made with the French toast left over from breakfast.

Oh, yeah – and coffee.

Dinner (or supper, depending whether you dine or just chow down) is lunch with all the stops removed, featuring soup, salad, kebabs – mutton, minced lamb, chicken, reshmi (meatballs), or veggies, fish – usually local and usually fried, goat cheeses, biryani with lamb or chicken added, bhuna gosht – a mutton casserole, dal palak – spinach steamed with lentils, spaghetti (yup – good ol’ number eight with Bolognese sauce), tikka – chicken in spiced yoghurt, chawal sabzi – boiled rice and veggies (unseasoned except for a bit of salt), jalferazi – chicken with chili sauce, kulcha, paratha, and desserts. And they *do* like desserts – pastries, rice pudding (kheer), mousses (meeses?), chocolate, fruit and some local novelties. Most interesting one I saw was a steamed, sugared meringue balloon (literally) called – I think – puri (I can’t swear to the pronunciation, ‘cuz the guy I asked was talking with his mouth full of ‘em). It looked like the perfect complement to a Cosmo, in case the Ladies are pondering light munchies for the next Castle shindig (gotta keep ‘em warm, though, or they deflate before they hit your plate).

Almost forgot the coffee.

And – ummmmm – I’m gonna have to auger another notch in my belt.

On the *inside* side. Lost about five pounds in a week and I haven't the foggiest notion of where I left 'em.

Prepping for another tapeworm jape from Barb...

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Of course, I realize that folks usually come here for the ambience and not the food. The vid that John gave me the other day came with the caveat that it wasn't the right mod, which may have caused some head-skritching among the folks who figure a Cobra is a Cobra is a Cobra.

*This* is the mod (one of the mods, anyway) that I fly -- the AH-1F. Ahhhhh. Ambience...

Chucklingly enough, the 'Structor Pilot in the pic is also named Bill. And yeah, I OPSECed the traceables...