The BCR Labs matter-transference box pinged today, delivering Cato the Elder's response today. We like Cato. Well, we like his oratorical skillz. We should, we shamelessly stole his theme...
Cato the Elder
1. To harden myself to the True Roman Way, I chewed iron nails for breakfast. Much later I was informed the early Romans did not have iron nails. Damn Greeks! They think they know everything!
2. Before I had my own children to beat, I borrowed the neighbor's to perfect my technique.
3. If Scipio Africanus had been named something nice, like Maximus Fuzzius, maybe we could have been friends. If True Romans have friends, that is.
4. Whenever I wonder if I am Truly Roman enough, I have the urge to fall on my sword to see if I will moan or not.
5. I mistrust Greeks because their letters have squiggles. A True Roman does not squiggle!
6. and to conclude, CARTHAGE MUST BE DESTROYED!
You heard it here first!
