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Midnight in the Museum

Here's the situation: You're the honcho of a museum full of militaria and, since the neighborhood is full of retirees who started their careers in a horse-drawn artillery outfit, one of your displays just happens to be --

Chairborne Ranger

-- an officer's horsie togs from the thirties.

With horsie accoutrements, naturally.

Horse goodies

Now, out of the blue, a museum visitor says, "You know what you need? A horse. Want one?"

After determining that the visitor is referring to an equine mannequin (reitpferdequin?) and not a genuine oat-burner, you say, "You betcha!"

Two days later, you're the proud owner of a fiberglass horse.

A horse of a different color

A *red* fiberglass horse. So, you stick your fake rider on your fake horse and it looks like

A horse is a horse of course, of course…

a dressmaker's dummy sitting on a red plastic horse. Changing your viewing position doesn't change your viewpoint -- it looks like a dressmaker's dummy sitting on a red plastic horse no matter where you're standing...

Wilbur -- dig the old geek walking past Sanger's tank…

Okay, it's time to unpack the artsy-stuff and get some trompe l'oiel-ishness goin' here...

To be continued.

15 Comments

John, how about getting out the old airbrush and making the red horse brown, and maybe add a little skin color to the gray faced mannequin?
 
AH, I am not nearly as bothered by the colors as I am the lack of a saddle. "50 Miles in The Saddle" by MAJ. Asburns. "Ducking and Covering"
 
I'm wondering why it isn't falling off or over. Must be the starch. I'm also somewhat disturbed by one of the hooves.
 
Ledger - Airbrush-schmairbrush. I do things the old-fashioned way. 'Cuz I'm *old*... OD -- We've got a McClellan saddle. We're cleaning it up because the roof over our vault caved in. Love them plastic lock-bins we store the paper stuff in. Is it just my lousy connection, or are there only three pix in the post?
 
*fix-fix-fix-type-type-type* Oh, yeah. Much better now... No fiberglass horses were injured during the creation of this three-parter.
 
Heh. That rider looks like he's wearing *my* cap. Everybody but me who tries to wear *my* saucer cap pretty much looks like that. Without the jodphurs.
 
Trias - Those extensions to the side of the hooves are mounting brackets. It used to be on the second floor of a tack shop. Heh -- *tell* me "tack shop" is an Ozzie euphemism for a house of ill repute...
 
nice boots... ..and the horse should be jet black, with just a white diamond patch.. and call him "Rienzi".
 
This Rienzi? UP from the South at break of day, / Bringing to Winchester fresh dismay, / The affrighted air with a shudder bore, / Like a herald in haste, to the chieftain's door, / The terrible grumble, and rumble, and roar, / Telling the battle was on once more, / And Sheridan twenty miles away. ... / The first that the general saw were the groups / Of stragglers, and then the retreating troops; / What was done? what to do? a glance told him both, / Then, striking his spurs, with a terrible oath, / He dashed down the line 'mid a storm of huzzas, / And the wave of retreat checked its course there, because / The sight of the master compelled it to pause. / With foam and with dust the black charger was gray; / By the flash of his eye, and the red nostril's play, / He seemed to the whole great army to say, / "I have brought you Sheridan all the way / From Winchester, down to save the day!" --From Sheridan's Ride And this one? "In one of the closing scenes of the war -Five Forks- General Phil Sheridan was personally directing a movement against the Confederates who were protected by temporary entrenchments about two feet high. The Federal forces, both cavalry and infantry, were suffering from a sharp fire, which caused them to hesitate. "Where is my battle-flag!?" cried Sheridan. Seizing it by the staff, he dashed ahead, followed by his command. The gallant steed leaped the low works and landed the federal general fairly amid the astonished Southerners. Close behind him came Merritt's cavalrymen in a resistless charge which swept the Confederates backward in confusion." V/R
 
..the same. ..and what's got himself his own statue down at the horse museum for Morgans down in Kentucky. ..a lovely little beastie if i do say so meself.
 
Don't forget the old stuffed equine, neighbors to the Virginia Military Institute, along with his owner. Great man, great leader, wonderful horse. Find a picture of R.E. Lee in the saddle and match that pose!
 
I'd say this fellow looks like he's been drinking (not unusual for cavalry) and has jumped on board one of those grocery store ponies to the amusument of all of his dressmaker dummy friends.
 
kat - If you'd seen the getup the dummy -- errrr -- mannequin was wearing before we inherited it, you wouldn't blame it a bit for getting snockered...
 
[quote]No fiberglass horses were injured during the creation of this three-parter.[/quote] Bucephalus may beg to differ.
 
That is just so gay. And I mean that in a bad way. In all possible bad ways. Stupid dummy!