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S.I.T.

August 18, 2006 | | Comments (12)

As in, "I said, 'SIT!'--not 'Assume a good prone firing position...' "

Meet Scruple-In-Training Toby, who's technically not a scruple because he has a genuine owner.

Toby

However, said genuine owner claimed he was absolutely impossible to train, so KtLW volunteered the services of the local Dog Whisperer--me.

After a week of Basic, he heels like a champ, fetches, comes-sits-flops-stays on command and is totally housebroken (except for an early misunderstanding about the purpose of a throw-rug).

Welllll, he does it for *me*, anyway. She's still having problems with him 'cuz I haven't told her The Secret of Consistent Obedience--in other words, just *what* it is I whisper into the little tyke's ear...

"Hellooooo, puppy, puppy, puppy! Aren't you a little cutie! Guess what--we're gonna play a game: I'll tell you to do something and then you do it or I'll kill you."

Heh. Works every time...

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12 Comments

By Cricket on August 18, 2006 8:55 AM
I love floppy doggies. What a cute little guy. Give him some scritches for me. Well, it seems that you have found your new career, Bill. Dog Whisperer. Have at it.
 
By FbL on August 18, 2006 8:59 AM
ROFL! Nice punchline. :D What a cute dog! He looks a scamp, but I can see you two are enjoy to enjoy each other.
 
By John of Argghhh! on August 18, 2006 9:42 AM
Careful, Bill, or you'll reinforce Trias' prejudices about military basic training we've been working so hard to unstick!
 
By Boquisucio on August 18, 2006 9:50 AM
I for one, do have a soft side for K9's. It's just a matter of letting the little ones (or in my case 96lbs Rotties), who's boss. Alfa = Calm and Assertive.
 
By Trias on August 18, 2006 10:14 AM
Ah ha I *knew* it :P
 
By cw4(ret)billt on August 18, 2006 12:18 PM
Trias - Note I whisper, not scream at the top of my lungs. I don't have to holler, because I know where their mental switches are and what turns them on and off. Dogs are social carnivores, i.e., pack-runners, while troops are social omnivores, i.e., ruck-toters--animals respect quickness rather than strength, but men respect strength, either mental or physical. Animals and men have one thing in common--once you have earned respect, you'll have willing obedience. The key word is *willing*...
 
By cw4(ret)billt on August 18, 2006 12:23 PM
Boq - I'll see your 96-lb Rottie and raise you a 110-lb Samoyed-Lab mix. Betcha they're both huge lapdogs at heart. Cricket - You'd have a blast with Toby. He'll flop in a heartbeat. FbL - "Scamp" is an understatement.
 
By Cricket on August 18, 2006 1:40 PM
My parents got a black Lab pup when I was a year old. To this day, when I see a black Lab, I tear up. Some *^^% shot him and caused paralysis. We had to euthanise him when I was 13. That was one of the few times I saw my dad shed tears. He carried that big old dog in to the vet's treatment room so Curly wouldn't die alone. Toby? What a cute name for a floppy puppy! It fits him. He looks like the kind that loves to play.
 
By Murray on August 19, 2006 2:55 AM
There was a time when I found it much easier to pursuade people, get them to do things for me and generally bend them to my will. I always assumed it was my convincing presentation of the matter but on reflection it seem that fact that I was carrying an M16 for living may have played a part. I miss my M16.
 
By cw4(ret)billt on August 19, 2006 7:31 AM
Cricket - His middle name is "WannaplayNOW!" Jake has been teaching him how to deliver an effective left hook while pouncing on Scout and Scout has been teaching him how to outrun a 110-lb Samoyed-Lab mix. When I was a kid, I worked on my buddy's dad's farm on weekends. Some jackal from NYC, who thought he was in the Black Forest because he didn't see wall-to-wall buildings, shot their Chessie retreiver because he "thought it was a deer." Wasn't even hunting season. He had to hang around 'til the local cop arrived because there was an arrow in each of his tires. Murray - Wear an under-the-armpit holster and keep your wallet there for a bit of bulk. Tell people it's still new and you're "tuning" it so it'll be comfy when you're at work...
 
By Cricket on August 20, 2006 8:39 AM
I dislike people who shoot first and ask questions later. And the arrows in the tires...you wouldn't happen to know who shot those rounds off, would you?
 
By Cricket on August 20, 2006 8:39 AM
I dislike people who shoot first and ask questions later. And the arrows in the tires...you wouldn't happen to know who shot those rounds off, would you?
 
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