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Um, sweetheart? Honeybunch? Sweetiekins?

By The Armorer on July 27, 2006 | | Comments (25) | TrackBacks (1)

Can I put this in the living room?

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A fine product from Ford.

The Fire Control Computer.

Pretty please?

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A Personal Anecdote about Fletchers and Mexico from The Bow Ramp on July 28, 2006 12:55 AM

It was my first time in a foreign country. It was also the first time it dawned on me that being in the service just might be a tad dangerous. We had fired off several rounds of 5" and I was admiring the fall of shot around the target sled when thing... Read More

25 Comments

By Old Fat Sailor on July 27, 2006 8:48 PM
Whats the Mark? I don't think its a 56, 33 maybe? Ah for the days of tangent cams and vacume tubes
 
By Neffi on July 27, 2006 8:49 PM
LOVE THE CRANK!! Reminds me of the M13 ballistic computer on the M60A1... hey, it worked, OK?! Get some, GunBunny! heh
 
By Trias on July 27, 2006 8:57 PM
Good gracious you can probably see the capacitors in those little windows. Didn't someone once say never trust a computer you can't chuck out the window?
 
By John of Argghhh! on July 27, 2006 9:02 PM
This is a mechanical computer, Trias. More in common with Babbage's Difference Engine than what's on your desk.
 
By Trias on July 27, 2006 9:17 PM
Wow a precursor like the old decoders. That's worth it alone.
 
By John S. on July 27, 2006 9:18 PM
This is the Mark IA fire control computer used in all the WW2 DDs. The Mark 1A is the size of a large desk and uses a horizontal reference from the stable element, and compass direction and ship's heading from the gyrocompass, and speed from the pit log. Fire Controlmen (no not the guys with funny hats and hoses) manually add in other info like target range and bearing from the fire control radar/optical rangefinder, and target course and speed (or derive it from successive range and bearing inputs). Then the truck load of mechanical gears and analog gizmos concealed in the computer begin to twirl and dance and make other dials and needles spin until they are "plot set" with the fire control solution. The computer generates the correct train and elevation setting for the gun mounts, and time of flight for setting the fuzes. And, it conctantly updates those as the target and the firing ship maneuver. Ah, for the smell and glow of 15 pounds of SPDN powder pushing 54 pounds of love into the sunset at 2600 feet per second. Arrggghhh! Report when on station ready for call for fire!
 
By cw4(ret)billt on July 27, 2006 9:36 PM
Yeah, but how accurate is it with punt guns?
 
By Beth on July 27, 2006 10:27 PM
Aw, Sweetheart, it won't fit through the door. Too bad!
 
By Trias on July 27, 2006 10:50 PM
Do you honestly think a door problem will stop him?
 
By BloodSpite on July 28, 2006 12:17 AM
A *ahem* test firing for range accuracy will fix the door problem :)
 
By John of Argghhh! on July 28, 2006 7:27 AM
Snerk! C'mon fellas, do/did your SO's let you down that gently, or did they just shriek "No, you flaming idiot!" and the discussion ended there? Of course, if we ever *do* a remodel that opens an outside wall of the house...
 
By BloodSpite on July 28, 2006 7:34 AM
My Glorious Bride 2.0 (tm) has developed a unique method of letting me down. She looks at me with this perfect imitation of a thousand yard stare, makes a cross between a grunt and a snicker sound and walks off.
 
By AFSister on July 28, 2006 8:03 AM
BS... that's a trademark for women, you know. We have the "hmphf" look down pat.
 
By Ryan Gill on July 28, 2006 10:19 AM
If you've got a sliding glass door, they' go in nicely. I suspect you can probably turn the fire control comuter on it's side too.
 
By cw4(ret)billt on July 28, 2006 12:11 PM
They got it *in* there through watertight doors narrower than household standard and it can go *out* through those same doors--and fit through a household standard. One. Piece. At. A. Time.
 
By KCSteve on July 28, 2006 12:35 PM
I don't know John. It just doesn't look like a Living Room accessory to me. More like something for your den, if you have one. If not it seems like the perfect excuse to add a den just so you have a place to put it. Hmmm... maybe an 'upstairs' addition so you can add some other goodies to go along with the fire controller...
 
By ry on July 28, 2006 1:31 PM
Hey, couldn't we fit that in the garage? Right next to the Lawn Tractor de Argghhh!. A few additions and it's a bar for the garage. Nope, I don't have a valid CDL anymore so I can't do it on a flatbed(plus I can't see for chit anymore). Maybe Brab could do it?
 
By John S. on July 28, 2006 5:25 PM
These were NOT brought in thru the watertight doors, but installed during construction. To replace one, you cut an 8 foot by 10 foot hole in the side of the ship, and remove the interior bulkheads and equipment in the way. Then the cranes and riggers magically move heavy things in impossible directions and your computer is where it belongs. Assemble rest of ship parts back where they were. Figure about 2 weeks minimum.... at least that's how long it wook when we changed out ours on DD-844 in 1967.
 
By Trias on July 28, 2006 5:27 PM
I suspect it will be *really* heavy so one would need much trust in the builder for an upstairs job. One also suspects turning it on the side will break it.
 
By John of Argghhh! on July 28, 2006 6:54 PM
What John S. said. The three ton weight, as Trias notes, is also rather a problem. Besides, Ward told me I can't have it, and the one on the Gearing next to the Rodgers has been looted for the other Gearing still in service. Sigh. Then there's the prime tourist time weight embargo on the luggage, too.
 
By Casey Tompkins on July 29, 2006 2:12 AM
So then, John (D. or S., either way): just to ask a dumb question, this is an analog computer, yes? Also, did the destroyers use these computers when executing fire support for invasions, such as the Emmons at Normandy? Or was that direct fire? Magnificent history you don't normally get to see.
 
By Justthisguy on July 29, 2006 12:49 PM
Oh MAN is it an analog computer! It has ball-and-disc integrators, and differential gears, and three-dimensional cams, etc, out the wazoo, usw! Gene Slover (an old Fire Controlman) has a Web site with copies of some of the original Navy training literature, including some of the math. Even dumbed-down a bit for sailors, said math still made my brain hurt when I tried to follow it. "Oh yeah," (thinks me) "angles don't add like vectors, and maybe if I drew it..."
 
By Blackhawk on July 29, 2006 1:41 PM
Hmm...don't think the Mrs. will approve? How about a different approach... From the galley: "Honey, look: a new kitchen! Now we can sling hash for 50!" Is there a briefing room? "Look: a new living room with lots of seating!" Capt Quarters: "A new guest bedroom!" Intercom system: "Now we can talk to each other anywhere in the house!" Is there a steam horn? "Our own tornado siren!" Compass, sextant, little things: "Look: accessories!" Don't give up just yet...there are possibilities to explore!
 
By Mythilt on July 29, 2006 2:34 PM
Simple answer..."No, you will shoot your eye out." (Can't believe no one thought of that response.)
 
By Barb on July 30, 2006 11:39 AM
Mythilt - At least he can't stab himself with it. Besides, Beth is one of the few wives who would probably *not* say that!!