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Blogging with thin skin...

Is dangerous. For the same reason being a thin-skinned politician is dangerous. Or any Public Person.

I ran into some illustrative examples yesterday.

You see, I blog out my a$$. A Public Person who blogs and is a media maven told me so.

First up. If you blog or want to blog, read this. Why I Hate Weblogs. Written tongue-in-cheek, with bite. BTW, I scored "normal" on the quiz in Appendix A. The whole thing is good for keeping your perspective (which most of us lose doing this, at one time or another). The key to losing it is to keep in in-house, and not share it around with everybody.

Kinda like Gary Trudeau, vice Ted Rall. Heh. Were I Ted, I would have talked to my lawyer first, before soliciting advice from my readers. But at least he was smart enough to collect pledges, and not money. Too bad Ted isn't willing to put his own money where his mouth is, he prefers instead to redistribute it from his readers. But voluntarily. He didn't suggest that the government collect the funds for him and deposit them in his account, so that's progress, coming from a lefty like Ted.

We on the right have our own thin-skinned people. For the record, if you'd like to complain to me about something I've written, this is *not* the approach I recommend.

I read your post about my "whining" to the idiot rottweiler. Do you always blog out of your a$$? You have NO IDEA what I said to the idiot because he lied and didn't post my e-mails to him. Why do you think he changed what he wrote and posted a "retraction"? I NEVER threaten to sue anyone over being offended. Believe me, his site, which I never before visited and won't again, is NOT worthy of my time and attention. I've been called a lot worse by more worthies and ignored it. But defamatory, LYING speech is NOT protected anywhere, much less so in your precious Denmark. I find it interesting that you are willing to write a blog entry, when you haven't a clue and you never read my e-mail. Like a true idiot . . . .

Debbie Schlussel

You know, she's right. I didn't know any of that. Nor, for the point I was making (see the blurb up early in yesterday's H&I that starts with "The Rottweiler") did I really need to. My point was simply that picking a fight with Misha, especially if that's the tone, just feeds the beast that is Misha's patented invective. Heh. That and the fact that I haven't really been all over supporting Denmark lately, but what the heck, she was on a roll.

Misha was, well, rather rude to her in his post. Okay, being mostly otherwise on the same team (or even if not, what the heck, honey gets more than vinegar) go tell him how hurt and annoyed you are and how inappropriate his comments were, and ask him to retract them and give him a chance to retreat gracefully. But toss invective at him? *That* helps. Not.

So, I responded.

Debbie -
1. Do you always email out your a$$? This email would seem to indicate yes, at least when you're annoyed. You should always reread and take a deep
breath before you send something like this.
2. If he never published your emails, I couldn't very well have read them, but that's a different issue.
3. My advice still stands. Whining at The Rottweiler just feeds him, basically the point of my post. I stand by what I said. Mistake, Debbie. None of which
has anything to do with the merits of your claim. A nice, measured email laying out your side of the story would go farther than "Do you always blog out of your
ass?" will. Just as I'm guessing a similar approach with Misha might have produced a slightly different response from him - but maybe not. He *is* the Rott, and that pretty much was the point of my post.
4. Small detail, I live in Kansas, not Denmark, I have no idea why you thought I might live in Denmark.
5. Your reading preferences are, of course, your right. I don't read him but once a week now either, mostly to see what the moonbats he attracts (in this
case, I'm not lumping you in, but if you were to continue in this tone, I might) but I do like a good rant, if only for variety. If you were to check any of the services that track such, you'll find that I'm not a prolific linker to him - though he was the first high-traffic blogger that linked to me, back in the days when I was getting started.
6. My blog entry, despite your personal angst over your tiff with Misha, wasn't really about you. It was about "Don't feed the animals, it just keeps them
hanging around." Now you're running around and kicking me in the shins.

So. Now my conundrum. Do I post your email and my response, or not?

Decisions, decisions. I'm of a mind to.

Obviously, we see what my decision was. In retrospect, my temper wasn't as under control as it might have been, either. I did edit the typos and for the PG-17C, btw. Mind you - I did edit my post, though perhaps not entirely to her liking.

I'll take the rest of the to the Flash Traffic/Extended Entry in the interest of my long-suffering dial-up customers.

Since Debbie is concerned about Misha not publishing the emails in her tiff with him, I will continue posting ours. She responded:

Gee, John, let's see. You said that I "whined about it" (his post). Since you haven't seen a single e-mail I sent him, how would you know that? In fact, I did NOT whine at all. I merely demanded that he take down the two defamatory items, which he did, b/c he knew he'd be sued. Did I whine about the rest of the absurd, insulting post? NO. Did I ask him to take it down? NO. Did I threaten to sue him over it? NO. Did it hurt my feelings? Puh-leeze. I couldn't care less what he thinks. But I do care when my reputation is falsely attacked. In fact, his latest e-mail to me, unsolicited is a nice apology. Unfortunately, it is complete bull excrement because he won't post it on his site, and has posted the exact opposite. It's all a complete lie, and the guy is a coward. But it's working for him, since all the sheep believe him, and apparently you did, too, claiming I "whined about it."

Baaaah.

In fact, she's mostly correct up there, in that I haven't seen the whole email stream between her and Misha. This is the point where I actually went and edited the post.

She says:

I've been called a lot worse by more worthies and ignored it. But defamatory, LYING speech is NOT protected anywhere...

followed by:

NO. Did it hurt my feelings? Puh-leeze.

...in her response to me. This, plus the effort she's going to, tells me someones feelings may in fact, be hurt. Just a thought, though I suspect Debbie doesn't think I'm much capable of that. Anyway, trying to keep the focus mostly on what I meant by my post, and tossing out some "Hey, we're on the same side" let's close this out patter, I responded:

BTW - just to make sure I knew who I was talking with, I checked your blog. We have far more in common than disagreement.

But really, emails like this to guys like me doesn't help you, and only reinforces what guys like Misha think.

Sometimes, once you've gotten what you're after, it's better to just let it lie, even if it grits your teeth to do it.

How many other people did you send something like this to? Hopefully only me - otherwise you are potentially going to light up the aggregators, and not in a flattering light.

Of course, being a Media Figure, perhaps you're looking for some exposure, I dunno. But the tagline around Castle Argghhh! is, Wahabism Delenda Est.

In fact, we're Number 1 in Google for it.

I followed that up immediately with this:

Okay, yer pissed. I'll sign off with "Baaaah!" But my point still stands - you're just making it worse - unless of course, you want the bump in the aggregators.

Cheers,

John

And Debbie, who is not offended or anything, comes back with this (and the conversation ends at this point, unless this post torques her enough to reopen it)

And your evidence that I "whined about it" is? . . . .

She hasn't seen the edits. She probably still hasn't. And I don't think she's really interested in it, either.

Bottom line:

1. If you blog, this stuff happens. Live with it.

2. If you do feel defamed and can't let it go, great. In this case, Misha *was* over the top. So be polite (you don't have to be nice, but be polite) and ask the offending party to take it down, or amend it. If you go for the Nuclear Option (lawsuit) right out of the gate, well, you might not like the result.

3. Don't go sending emails asking people if they blog out their a$$ and then spend electrons pointing out how you aren't offended easily. It just makes it worse.

Just sayin'. A polite "my side of the story" email would have made this a different post. I was still going to run with the "Why I hate Blogs" bit as advice for new bloggers and a reminder for old bloggers. But Rall and Schlussel's actions made this ripe for expansion.

Debbie - I'm mostly on your side politically, and see some merit in your argument regarding the whole Rott thing. But how about a little politesse?

18 Comments

Had a fella E-mail me his opinion on a story. Our points of view differ greatly. However he was polite about it, and once in a while we still swap E-mails. Something that has always baffeled me about a lot of left leaning bloggers. Most Center/Right blogs understand the ideal of "We see your point. We understand your arguement. We just don't agree with it" and can do it Politely....while most left seem to stomp their feet and pitch tantrums. Just the view from my side o the street. Good attempt to sooth things over tho sir.
 
Debbie is a right-winger, just for the record. Gotta be fair and balanced!
 
Yeah, and she's kind of cute, too. Wish I could get on her email list ;-)
 
Wow. Really bad move on Schlussel's part, all the way around. When I had that little dustup over Arkin (WaPo blogger/columnist), there were so many sites that linked to me that were full of trash and invective and inaccurate characterizations/info. I still encounter a new linker of that type every 5-7 days. When that happens, I reflexively hit "comment," and start to type. Then I look at the content again and realize commenting more won't accomplish anything productive--I've already responded to their general points within the very post they're usually linking, and ultimately it doesn't matter that a blogger who doesn't know me from Adam and doesn't have a grasp of the facts of the case wants to be rude and insulting (even slanderous). I'm rather surprised and disappointed that Schlussel didn't take the same view here. Though bitty bloggers like me aren't even in the same universe as media figures like Schlussel, I think the same principal applies: it's not all about you. It's about the story and the ideas and the conversation. If someone spews what you see as nothing more than uninformed and cretinous invective, then you need to be secure enough in who you are and why you write to believe that he isn't worth your time. That old quote about the pig comes to mind... [And none of the above is a reflection of my view of Misha... just looking at things from Schlussel's perspective]
 
Dang it! I can't believe I typed "principal" instead of "principle." That's what I get for commenting from work (school), haha!
 
Yea I saw she was a right side. I guess thats why I mentioned what I did. Sort of confused me by her reaction because it's not what I'm used to. I can name any number of bloggers I associate with who we don't agree, but we still respect each others views. Her reaction just smites...of..well..tantrum throwing.
 
There are tantrum-tossers on both sides of the line, just as there are reasonable contrarians (and we're contrarians to the lib-leaners) there. The Left has more flamers, I posit, because they generally post from emotion, rather than logic, and it fits perfectly with the only debating style with which they're familiar: the Carville Method--pick one point, repeat it ad infinitum and do it *loudly*. Since they don't often have facts to support their argument, they have to fall back on emotion--at least they're playing to their strength. So, it could be worse. Just suppose you had Arianna Huffington for a groupie instead of Debbie... *scrambling for the bunker, hastily donning kevlar enroute*
 
Why does she go to great lengths to say that she didn't threaten to sue him, and then say that he took them down because he knew he would be sued? How could he 'know' that unless she TOLD him that? *throwing out boric acid 'sand' for her to play in* As to the worthy Ms. Huffington, at least she allows for disagreements on her blog.
 
Heh. The Huff allows Greg Gutfield, which makes The Post worth a periodic visit. If DS is representative of our fans, hmmmmm. I think I'll stick with Barb, AFSis, W-K, FbL, Punct, SWWBO, Flutterby (where's *she* been lately?), Kat, Maggie, and Cricket as a fan club. Did I miss anybody? If so - make room in the bunker, Bill!
 
Flutterby's going through Basic as a prep for WOC. *grin* She's got her sights set on flying Chinooks--I can already see her flying into Andrews AFB for a static display and taking pix of people taking pix of her...
 
I think I'll stick with Barb, AFSis, W-K, FbL, Punct, SWWBO, Flutterby (where's *she* been lately?), Kat, Maggie, and Cricket as a fan club. Did I miss anybody? Expect incoming from Cassie. And, on a semirelated note, I notice that Ted Rall didn't produce a single peep when Michelle Malkin raked him over the coals. Heh. He sez he's not worried about a Coulter defense of "I was only funnin' " because Ann Coulter's not funny. Based on that criterion, Ann Coulter's got nothing to worry about a Ted Rall offense, either...
 
Teh GUtfield Drivebys. Funny stuff. ANd the comments threads for his posts are hilarious. Flame spewing liberals run full tilt into coolaid drinking cons commentors. It's like watching matter and anti matter run into each other. You know though, sometimes blue-on-blue things like this are sometimes good (Like the formation of the Carnival of the RINO thing). We get to find out who has the goods and who doesn't.
 
My grandmother always told me, when you find yourself in a hole, you should stop digging. Pity most folks don't get that. Frankly, I didn't read her post or Misha's, but your point was taken. You should have seen was written about me in 2004 When I had the temerity to write about Michael Moore in an unflattering way. Actually, that's being nice. The crazies had a field day and my mailbox was full of very explosive comments. I just laughed. You're right, though, a lot of new bloggers can't always take it when they get a response to their comments that is rather insulting and sometimes old bloggers have gathered a following that they get all comfortable with and *boom* one day a fly in the ointment. But, maybe Debbie was hurt more because she is a fellow right and a fellow right dished her up to the raving wolves? Don't know, but, I standby my grandmother's advice. Dear Debbie, Stop digging. Yours, Kat
 
Cassie won't be offended; John links to her at least two, three times a week.
 
I think one is insane to have a blog. If one has a blog, anybody in the whole wide world gets to read what one types in the middle of the night, after having gotten all emotionally and intellectually exercised from reading blogs and other silly things on the InterWeb, and having drunk too much. I have a blog. Sigh. In my defense, may I say that you other people provoked me? The Donovan kept poking me, but the precipitating event was Amanda Baggs' having problems with the host of her previous blog, so that I had to sign up with Blogger to make smart remarks and silly comments on her blog. I think it's at http://Ballastexistenz.blogspot.com. I think of Jerry Pournelle being tossed off the Internet, before the Internet actually existed under that name, back in the 70s, for drunken late-night postings.
 
Misha did publish her emails.
 
Well, I think she was right. Now that Misha's posted the letters, I think I can see that she did not whine once. She pissed, she moaned, she pitched a bitch, threw a fit, and lobbed insults of a quality that I associate with pubescent underachievers and teen dullards, but I don't see any whining. If I were you though, I'd ask her for an objective set of standards to definitively qualify whining just to be sure. Until I get that, I'd leave the whining attribution in place. Whining is in the eye of the beholder.
 
One man's wine is another man's beer. In any event, Miss S. has certainly made it plain that she is hypersensitive. Which has earned her a big "de-list" from my blogroll.