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Argghhh!!!

I think I'll go home and bury myself in a bottle of tequila... I will *be* the worm...

Dusty links to Lowry today in The Corner - where Lowry is posting the stuff I posted yesterday... but Dusty's post gets linked and mine goes unmentioned (note to self, *quality* apparently *does* matter)...

Bill thought I was mad at him this morning. Not enough emoticons, apparently...

Cassie is snarking me and I don't have time to properly enjoy it. And that's *really* aggravating... Lioness is making kissy-face with Cassie (well, I *do* like to watch) in the comments.

Sgt B is snarking me about my non-functional collection pieces... Dude - IT'S THE LAW "ROUND HERE! (snarl, spit, growl)

And SWWBO *still* ain't home and leaves again on Sunday...

*looks aroundly darkly with slitted eyes...*

Man! I'm gonna set the scruples loose on all y'all!

43 Comments

uummm... is this a bad time to ask for a raise in my allowance, John?... but if you run out of tequila, you're welcome to borrow my Thorazine pistol heh
 
hzzz kewl! name bosco thinks this a fine day for birding! name bosco cruise out to side yard by where blujays buildng nests. blujay skwawkybird swoop down, divebomb poor name bosco. name bosco pretend to be scared, hunker hull-down in so-high unmowed grass . bird swoop down .. too slow! ha ha very tasty lunch!
 
I'll send you the gory details by e-gram tonight. No, Lyonnaise, t'ain't about you, although [*swat*][*duck*][*clean mi--*KICK!*][*ooof*]ow...
 
I did tell you I like that hat, right. Some nice that hat. I have even kept the cats off of it. Go have some Guinness anyway. Good for ya, as we say back in Nova Scotia.
 
I could say something about gunners and stability, but I can wait .... Cheers JMH
 
I know Neffi's truname! I know Neffi's truname! *Great* CD dude! I'll have to go visit myself! Thanks!
 
John - How can you visit yourself?? With Beth gone, we have to keep an eye on you ;-)
 
John, we all know SWWBO has been gone for a while, but they say 'visiting yourself' can cause blindness... oh, wait- I can still see... never mind...
 
heh- snarkiness is but one of the services we provide... here at Castle Arrggh!
 
Careful dude. I know your truname....
 
[casts powdered magii bone onto fire, wafts sacred smoke onto 'puter] Truname... hah! You dasn't... don't fergit, you'll be travelling this way, and my bayonets are as functional as the day they were forged. Got a nice Brown Bess from the Rev War, if that would suit your historical bent heheh [thinks- hope Beth gets home soon, soothes the savage beast]
 
So, Neffi... Did the spell work? Is it safe to drop by for a visit? (I did notice some dark passages ways of the Castle that aren't fit for a lady tonight, though...)
 
There are *no* unsafe passages in the Castle, Lioness. The Master and Mistress do *not* permit it. Any problems you run into in the darkness... you brought with you!
 
Boy your really are in a bad mood, aren't you? ;)
 
And notice, I didn't say anything about unsafe. I said "unfit for a lady." :)
 
Okay, everybody! Listen up! Er, read up! Oh, whatever... 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D 8^D Izzat *enough* smiley faces for everybody? Geez. My "passages" comment wasn't a snark - just the truth! We don't allow danger in the Castle. Some peril, perhaps. And if you let Neffi follow you... well, I stand by my previous! And yeah, you did say 'unfit' - but that's Neffi again!
 
Passages and spells; and dark corridors of stone... I can see John lurking in a dim recess, wiping an oily rag along rifled barrels of polished steel- cackling softly as the cats sidle and purr about his legs... a stone amulet with Neffi's truname carved in crude strokes by a bronze blade dangling over a fitful fire. Outside, a distant storm rumbles and mutters, blue streaks illuminating the ragged crenellations of Castle Arrggh...
 
The Armorer does *not* 'cackle'. Sheesh. The occasional menacing chuckle, perhaps. But he does *not* cackle.
 
..the menacing chuckle echoed eerily through the torch-light stone passage- Neffi froze, the hair on his nape rising in primordial fear... [whispers] 'Ware, Lioness- the tequila has driven him... only the mad dare trespass further!' (shrugs- [Eric Idle voice]- oh wot the 'ell)
 
Neffi, a little bird told me to check your mailbox.
 
Jeez! I can't type! Neffi, I little bird told me TO TELL YOU to check your mailbox. *grr, grumble, grumble*
 
...with scruple-like reflexes, Neffi springs back into the clammy stone wall, whipping out his Ronco Thorazine Dart-A-Matic in a practiced move... hands barely quavering, he stares over the sights at the grotesque spectre leering at him from the stoney embrasure. The tattered vulture leans forward, leering through beady eyes. 'Yesssss, Neffi' comes the creeping hiss from deep in it's fetid bowels...' you heard me right, mortal- check your mail...' And a feather flutters slowly to the floor as the creature spins and launches itself into the sultry night, a screech fading with it...
 
Clammy? Carp, the heater for this hall must be on the fritz again....
 
..Fritz threw up his hands, shaking with terror. "Nein, bitte! Nicht schiessen!!" The Armorer calmly trained his heater on the helpless prisoner, thumbs poised over the butterfly trigger of the Vickers...
 
phew, enough! I need to go write that book while I'm 'hot'... thanks for the gracious hosting, John- see yez
 
Book? I was about to suggest one! :)
 
I think Neffi's gone to write. John's off visiting with himself, and my hubster is proving to me how much better he is at shooting pool.
 
Neffi, ol' manifold-manipulator, you've been into the Harlequin bodice-ripper collection again, haven'tcha?
 
name bosco better leave the bluejays alone! I feed all those birds outside the castle so the cats can watch through the window. There are dangers in the Castle hallways - it's amazingly easy to trip over Gandalf, Annie or Hal.
 
By the way, all, I am as anxious to get back to the Castle (and beloved John) as I can be. The Southerners are kind, but there is no place like home.
 
hzzz name bosco the blacke ask, nice name beth lady feed blujay ? provide target rich envrironment? name bosco the blacke thank name bosco watch thru window too; good recon vital name bosco also bagged hummerbird; so quick so deadly name bosco!
 
*cue passing body of troops* *cue jody-caller* "Bosco Blacke, ----BOSCO BLACKE Seeking a thrill, ----SEEKING A THRILL Watched the birds, ----WATCHED THE BIRDS, from the windowsill! ----FROM THE WINDOWSILL! SWWBO saw, ----SWWBO SAW, and she saw red, ----AND SHE SAW RED, she coaxed him close, ----SHE COAXED HIM CLOSE, and smashed his head!? ----AND SMASHED HIS HEAD! Sound Off! ----ONE TWO! Sound Off! ----THREE FOUR! Bring it on back now... *troops pass out of hearing* *crickets chirp* "Eeewwww! Someone clean this mess up off the windowsill! Jooooohhhhhnnnnnnnn!"
 
John, you can't set the scruples on anyone, they are still drunk from yesterday. Well, I guess they could gas people. Oh, and make sure you lock them up tight tonight, you know how bad scruples are when they have a hangover from a two day binge.
 
Great cadence, John. ROTFLOL!
 
[*jumping up off the floor*] Oops! Shouldn't do that (ROTF) without first making sure certain Denizens aren't around...
 
hzzzz name bosco the blacke not like cadence, not funny should send name swwbo lady picur of name bosco the black name swwbo would so-say oooh could never want to hurt so-hansome trained killer name bosco get man to do this name pertinax sleeping name bosco will walk on face
 
John, lad! I didn't mention the non-functional aspect of your collection as a snipe snark... I'm a MACHINEGUNNER fer gawsh sakes, so looking at an MG that has been de-milled is like standing beside the casket of an old friend... I just thought you'd like to be able to contrast that sad state of affair with something that is not only purty, but fully functional... (Yeah, I know, the LAW... Of course, iff'n ye decide to go after some third world country, and create yer own set o' rules, gimme about 30 minutes to pack m' gear, and let me know where to meet the transport...)
 
It is getting downright poetic around here. Pretty soon folks are gonna be running around these halls spouting "Turns in the void expelling human beings, Pigs, turtles, frogs, insects, nits," or perhaps "If you think I come hither as a lion, it were pity of my life: no I am no such thing;" then there is "For we two look two ways, and cannot shine With the same sunlight on our brow and hair." ('cept this one will prolly make John even more melancholy.) But methinks we should stick with "Here's a bottle and an honest friend! What wad ye wish for mair, man?"
 
"If you think I come hither as a lion, it were pity of my life: no I am no such thing;" I resemble that remark... ;)
 
"T'was brillig, and the slithey toves Did gyre and gimble through the wabe..." ...and stepped on a scruple, who, startled, leaped from underfoot, bowling over Fuzzybear Lioness in the process, who squalled, flailed wildly as she tumbled into the drapes and managed to bring the drapes, shams, Barb, a bedoodlewhoopie, the curtain rod and a goodly portion of the nearby tapestry craching to the floor. Darn. Gotta work on the meter...
 
Oh, that DID work out well. Great, etc., cutie. [*bolt*]
 
Thanks for the humorous interlude. That was great!
 
name bosco - let my hummingbird go!