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This is no sh*t!**

Bill the Rotorhead, frequent commenter that he is (he's gonna graduate to guest-poster if he keeps providing gems like this) told a story in a comment to this post that is just too good to leave in the basement like that!

One of the first UH-1Ms (oh, go ahead, google it--I have no idea what you're gonna get, but it's a UH-1C gunship with a UH-1H engine) in the Delta dropped by our refuel/rearm point in Can Tho for a bit of last-light go-juice. The AC hopped out for some kidney relief while the crew chief and gunner pumped the fuel, leaving a--gasp!--newbie lieutenant on the controls (yes, the aircraft was running--us Huey drivers never did "cold" fuel). The crew chief mashed his mike button and asked Peter Pilot to check the fuel gauge to see how much fuel they'd pumped, and PP promptly pressed the trigger switch to reply.

Now, in the UH-1D or H, the trigger switch controls commo--first detent activates intercom, second detent keys the radio(s). In the UH-1M (it's a gunship--remember?), the trigger switch is--a trigger. Who sees what's coming next?

Yup. One 2.75-inch Mk 40 rocket with 10-pound warhead promptly departed each launcher. The rocket from the right launcher speared a revetment before the fuze armed and just sat there smoking; the rocket from the left one zipped down the runway, missed the hood of a fuel truck returning from the 'Hook hangars by a good six inches, went past my right ear and smacked into our ammo dump.

The fuze functioned properly.

We had a BIG ammo dump.

I wound up in a drainage ditch with the fuel truck crew on top of me (they had farther to run). I didn't complain about their lack of military courtesy (neither one saluted before he landed), because the rain of debris bounced off them instead of me.

When the smoke cleared, the Mike-model crew remembered a pressing social event and departed post-haste, the fuel handlers wobbled off to recover their truck (which was still sitting in the center of the runway) and I did a quick weather check--I discerned a severe drunk-front heading in my direction, so I strode off to meet it head-on... =]

**Milspeak for "Official Notification That I Am About To Tell A War Story"

7 Comments

am assuming no one was hurt - too much, anyway. this guy has a wonderful way of writing - lol.
 
Well, That is a good story, but I got a grunt "No S**t story. It was three days before my 20th birthday in 68 and we were back at a rear area (not very rear) taking a two day R & R by trying to get some real food and sleep. We had been out for over three weeks and needed new everything. Which of course they didn't have so we also were waiting for re-supply. We were in some tents left from some Jar Heads that had either forgotten them or thought that they would just "forget them" (Marines like to travel light). About 100 meters from us was refueling point. There were always two or three trucks there being refueled. The smell and the dust kicked up told us that we didn't have the best location. But we were so beat that we didn't give a S**t. It was early the second morning when we went back for our second shower. The first shower we had was cold and there were so many of us, that we couldn't get real clean. So our tent went down again that second morning for a longer, hopefully warm or hot shower. The shower point was even closer to the refuel area. So no matter if you went in dirty you would be covered in "clean" dust before you could get out of the area. I was almost finished with my short shower, when I determined that I looking at the boards on the floor and that I had this loud ringing in my ears and that I had a nose bleed. It took me a few seconds to really even know where I was or what had happened. When I had enough sense to raise my head and look around, all I could see was twisted canvas and naked butts, smoke and dust. It finally registered in my still groggy brain that there had been a round or an explosion nearby. I set up and felt around to see if all my parts were still attached. Then I checked to see if my "very important" parts were ok. Everything seemed to be ok so I decided to try and crawl. I didn't really know where I was crawling because I still could'nt see anythig for the smoke and dirt. But, figured I might find a hole somewhere that would offer me and my naked ass more protection. Several other guys had the same Idea, so we crawled and scampered down off the wood flooring into a ditch which ran down the hill. So, as I continued to listen to the whine and roar in my head, try to keep my head and ass down, I look around. Aligned in the ditch in almost military pose were a line of dirty, soot covered, naked guys. We all looked at each other and yelled (remember we are all almost deaf) "What the f**k is going on ?? and other inane questions. We later learned that due to some assholes carelessness, the refuel point had blown up. We had to leave that afternoon. When we left we were almost as dirty as when we had arrived. This is my post Papa Ray West Texas USA
 
Some days you just weren't meant to be clean. I found that out often enough! Thanks for sharing, Papa Ray!
 
The first layer of dirt protects you from all the other dirt you may acquire so, the first layer of dirt ought to be the very best dirt you can find.
 
Heh. I hadn't thought of it like that, Fred!
 
And the very best dirt is generally found in the vicinity of mechanized vehicles--it's been crushed, churned and generally beaten into submission by the treads, rendering it amazingly compliant when shower time--or a monsoon--happens to roll along...
 
In my non-military circles, these stories (on different specific subjects, of course) always start out "No sh*t, there I was..."
 
© 2008 John Donovan
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