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December 12, 2006

There is always a penalty...

...exacted for maintaining contact with kinfolk on the other side of Hadrian's Wall.

The penalty is -- British humo(u)r...

Far away, in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were swimming around in the warm, azure sea. One was named Justin and the other Christian. The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by the numerous sharks that patrolled the area.

One day, Justin said to Christian, "I'm bored and frustrated at being a prawn. I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."

As soon as Justin had fixated on becoming a predator, a mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted!" – and, lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.

Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time went on and Justin found himself becoming bored and lonely as a shark. All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin gradually realized that his new, menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

While out swimming alone one day, he saw the mysterious cod again and couldn't believe his luck. Justin figured that if the fish could change him from a prawn to a shark, he could just as readily change him back into a prawn. He begged the cod to return him to his original form and, lo and behold (again), he turned back into a prawn. With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes, Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail.

[note: the punch line does *not* involve a prawn cocktail -- that would be trite]

Looking around the boisterous gathering at the reef, Justin searched for his old pal. "Where's Christian?" he asked.

"He's at home, distraught that his best friend went over to the enemy and became a shark," came the reply.

Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Christian's house. As he opened the coral gate, the memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted, "It's me, Justin, your old friend! Come out and see me!"

Christian replied, "No way, man, you'll eat me! You're a shark, the enemy, and I'll not be tricked!"

Justin cried back, "No, no, I'm not! That was the old me -- I've changed..."

[punchline stashed in Flash Traffic to spare the excessively sensitive viewers -- both of them]

"...I've found cod and I'm a prawn again, Christian!"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Sometimes, I really hate myself.

Heh. This is *not* one of those times...

Tip o' the tam to Two Niner -- click here and see what thirty years does to color film!

Comments on There is always a penalty...
Maggie briefed on December 11, 2006 11:29 PM

Ugh, I'm going to bed now.

(nice pics,though)

BillT briefed on December 11, 2006 11:47 PM

Hmmpf. Here he went to all the trouble of including some squid shots taken in Jean-Fraude Kerry's stomping grounds (no, *not* Cambodia -- nobody's wearing CIA hats) and all that comes to mind is "nice pics"!?

Come to think of it, there were some *huge* prawns living in the Nam Can River. I'm surprised JFK didn't take photos of 'em and claim they were related to piranha...

Barb briefed on December 11, 2006 11:49 PM

Oh my Cod! Heehee...

Bill, don't know where ya been hidin', but glad to see signs of life, however punny!

FbL briefed on December 12, 2006 12:12 AM

Yay, he's alive! How's it going, Bill? You've been missed.

Trias briefed on December 12, 2006 12:42 AM

Yers we shaw you croshin the highway and completely mished you.

Justthisguy briefed on December 12, 2006 12:54 AM

Well, sir, you did not inflict upon me a sucking chest wound, nor yet a traumatic evisceration, nor any other actual physical hurt, but damn you sir,

those words hurt my brain! Ow ow ow ow OW ow ow!

BillT briefed on December 12, 2006 06:12 AM

[drive-by. gallumpfing off to a job fair in about five mikes]

Rumors of my demise (and/or finding somebody foolish enough to hire me) are still merely rumors. And I do have *some* remaining sensitivity, otherwise I'd-a posted one that'd prolly give everybody brain lesions (I've developed an immunity)...


wolfwalker briefed on December 12, 2006 07:20 AM

'Prawn my word! A pun that's clean, original, and funny all at once! That's amazing.

AFSister briefed on December 12, 2006 08:09 AM

Twitchy Bill SugarButtons is back in the saddle!

Well... ok. It's not a saddle, but you *are* an internet published author, comedian, and all-around good guy. Good luck at the job fair!

Maggie briefed on December 12, 2006 08:38 AM

That's as nice as I know that.

Also, do *not* call that weasel JFK!!! I believe that you did it on purpose to needle me.

(joins the SugarButtons Brigade in blowing kisses for luck at the job fair.)

darla briefed on December 12, 2006 12:03 PM

love a good pun! know any? ;-)

J.M. Heinrichs briefed on December 12, 2006 01:07 PM

Two maggots fighting in dead Earnest ...


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