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July 24, 2006

If One Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words--

--then these two oughta generate War and Peace in the comment blocks.

Okay, between job-hunting, dialup timeouts, KtLW's honeydew list (written on two rolls of TP--in 2-point Arial Narrow, shorthand, single spaced), the hourly electrical storms for the past week and training a puppy for someone who's clueless about dogs, I don't get out much anymore.

And now I get snarked because the comment parties are getting too blah-zay. Ohhhh-kayy, let's see if I can get something rolling, here...

While poking around Maryland after we got chased out by the flood a couple weeks back, KtLW spotted one of those roadside "Kitsch ‘Я’ Us" establishments and insisted on taking a shopping break. About thirty seconds after bailout from the car, she spotted a four-foot bronze of a frog using a lilypad (or a toad using a toadstool) as an umbrella. Yeah--a batrachian doesn't do *wet*, right?

KtLW: "It'll be *perfect* for the pond!"

Me: "It'll scare the daylights out of the fish and attract egrets the size of condors."

KtLW: "Besides, it's on sale. Look at the price--that's *cheap* for a bronze!"

Me: "Yeah, it's cheap for a one-half scale model of the USS Missouri, too, and *that* won't work in the pond, either."

I was adamant. I expounded on the fifty irrefutable reasons why buying the thing was a Bad Idea. Halfway through number fifty-one, she said, "I need a bathroom. Wait here."

Twenty minutes later, she was back.

"It'll be delivered in two weeks. We can go, now."

*sigh* They dropped it off last Friday. I spent an hour wading in the shallow end of the pond (27 inches deep, naturally) building a sunken pedestal and hooking the blamed thing up.

Okay--so it ain't a Botticelli.

I plugged in the pump, and after a couple of minutes of No Fountain, I figured the road trip disconnected the tubing somewhere inside and Frogzilla's interior was filling with water.

Right on cue, came the leak.

Got that kinda European thang going for it, huh?

KtLW looked at it for about a minute and said, "That is *NOT* the effect I was looking for."

Heh. Have at it, commenters!