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July 03, 2006

In Rapid Succession

Monday (19 June) through Tuesday (27 June): Daily downpours. Delaware River decides to flood again.

Wednesday (downpour now continuous) morning:

0300: Phone call: "The Island section of Trenton is already under water. We expect the river to crest five feet higher than it did in last year's flood. Prepare for probable evacuation."

0305: KtLW panics.

0600: Fishwrapper headline: "GET OUT!" in 2,000 point Arial Black. *hmmm--how'd the delivery guy make it through the water in his Yugo-clone?*

0605: KtLW panics.

0700: KtLW panics.

0800: KtLW panics.

0900: Fire guys making the rounds, telling everybody, "If you stay, you won't have electricity, water, telephone or access to emergency services. Plus Route 29 and half of Trenton is under water." On cue, power fails, water fails, telephone is dead as a doornail. KtLW panics: "I can't flush the toilet! I refuse to stay here if I can't flush the toilet!"

*real reason--no phone*

1000: Scruples safely at the vet's (he's on high ground), house prepped, I'm packed, Jeep's set to go, dropped a case of beer on Ed the Neighbor (who's been itching to try out his new generator and will be hanging around "until the water starts creeping under the deck"), KtLW still trying to decide on Evacuation Wardrobe.

1200: Back from watching the storm drains backing into the street, ask KtLW if she'd consider limiting the Evacuation Wardrobe to less than three cubic yards of stuff because I'd kind of like to take the spare tire, too.

1300--1740: Giving serious thought to mowing the lawn, despite torrential downpour.

1745: Commence lugging 2.7 cubic yards of KtLW Evacuation Wardrobe to Jeep.

1845: On the way to visit Maryland via the back roads to South Jersey, because the only local bridge still open is backed up for ten miles (I have a sudden insight into the Lemming Phenomenon and its contribution to transforming a simple "go from point A to point B" into an Emergency Ops guy's recurring nightmare).

2130: Arrival Maryland to hang out at a place with electricity, water, telephones and *no* cyber access.

Sunday (2 July) 2300: Back at stately Tuttle Manor. Flood's receded, power's back, water's (boil-before-drinking-or-bathing) restored, telephone's on. KtLW flushing toilet and giggling like an idiot--just like I did when I got back from RVN.

Monday (3 July) 0830: Scruples bailed out of the pokey, happy as clams, now sprawled on the kitchen floor--hoping I'll drop something interesting while I clean out the unidentifiables in the fridge. KtLW upstairs, wondering out loud (*very* out loud) why I can't do a simple thing like cleaning a refrigerator without raising a stink.

Planned for the Fourth: Neighborhhod Barbecue to eliminate up all the food that was in the freezers that unfroze--an event which has assumed "Annual" status. Anyway--I'm back. Got some interesting Gun Pr0n for you guys--if I can find the camera that's still trapped in the middle of 2.7 cubic yards of Evacuation Wardrobe...