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July 16, 2005

Rebecca's Kitchen

In support of Bill's post below, I offer this follow-up.

After Rebecca graduated from college (deliberately sans any MRS degree to go with her BA in Literature with a focus on Feminist Thought in Pre-Mayan Temple Carvings) she (understandably) discovered there was little commercial demand for experts in Feminist Thought in Pre-Mayan Temple Carvings, and with that 120K of student loans bearing down on her, found herself asking people if they'd "like fries with that." [Ah, now that's a sentence Bulwer-Lytton could sink his teeth into!]

Since her manager was a balding yet-otherwise-hairy fat man with bad teeth, thick glasses, and a shrewish wife plus he had delusions of grandeur that would make Walter Mitty proud, she always sought the safety and solitude of the rear window order-taking position. But... being a womyn of Passable Pulchritude®, Bad Manager with Wandering Hands kept scheduling her on the prep table, because he liked the view when she had to stretch across the table to get a knife or sweep away the trimmings. He really was a pervy little toad.

She would spend hours fantasizing that the various vegetables she was slicing were Bad Manager with Wandering Hands... Then came the day she imagined that the knife block was Bad Manager with Wandering Hands... and thus was born the idea that would make her #1 on Emily's List.

This is the first product of Rebecca's Kitchen and Teas, Inc.

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She's on her third stock split in two years.