Now it seems like I'm pimping...

...for Blackfive. He has an excellent post on racism. At least to my white butt.

I was raised an Army brat, through the 60's and 70's and then my career in the 80's and 90's. The riots of the 60's were just blips in the Stars and Stripes. We were overseas, and didn't have AFN telelvision yet (one reason why I read so much!).

Oh, I know that racism existed in the military - we are a reflection of society. My parents did a wonderful job of making it a non-issue. I just didn't notice race. Everybody was green, or blue, and sometimes white in the summer with them Navy folks. And the Army and Navy types could be tan, too.

The point is - I didn't start noticing race until I started watching TV. People were people. I didn't realize how subtle the acclimatizing is. My own Aha! moment about race came when Colin Powell was nominated for Chairman of the Joint Chiefs. I'd never served with him, and to my everlasting despair - my first thought was, "Is he an affirmative action appointee?" I must have said it out loud, because Larry Aaron, my boss, came down on me like a ton of bricks, making clear in no uncertain terms that was not the case.

What bothered me - was how facilely that thought fluttered up. If I'd ever served with GEN Powell, I wouldn't have had the thought - but I realized then and there how subtle the process of racism and our response to it can be.

I honestly don't think I'm racist. But then and there I realized that I had to pay attention, or I could slip into thought patterns without noticing. I'm glad it happened to me, and that I had a boss who saw fit to make it an emotional experience for me.

That incident caused me to pay attention more. And that's why I can empathize with BlackFive's post - I understand what Paul means when he says "Because of you, I have to be better. than. him." I don't understand it at the gut level - but since I had the realization that I could unthinkingly be a part of the problem, I realize that life is tougher for the Pauls of the world. Even in a meritocracy like the military.